A
female
age
41-50,
*ophia25
writes:My boyfriend of 17 months just told me he doesn't love me anymore, I am so confused. Just the weekend before we went to a party with his family and I was introduced as the future fiance! Then one night I come home and he says he doesn't want to get married and the next day he says he doesn't love me! What is going on and what should I do??
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2007): Well, a very similar thing happened to me at your young age with my boyfriend of 19 months, so maybe that is a critical point in a relationship....my guy met someone else and married her a year later, then divorced her in 5 years....I met up with him years later by accident and he apologized to me and said that he just did not know who he was and it cost him a wife and it cost him me....he offered this explantation about 12 years too late, but it was still pretty awesome to hear.
If he says he does not love you anymore, I don't think you will get what you want by persisting in asking for an explanation, I did that at your young age, and it just drove him away further. Hard as it is, don't talk to him, trust the bond that you have, and if he comes to his senses he will look you up. Earn his respect and act as if you won't stand in his way if he wants to leave you. He will regret it even if it is years down the road, but you can't change him with the strength of your love, he is just not ready for you.
It happens, you will love again and it will be with someone who is emotionaly ready to give you the relationship you want and deserve.
I am sorry this happened, it hurts like heck, I know.
A
female
reader, Sophia25 +, writes (8 February 2007):
Sophia25 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe is the one who introduced me as the future finace, and he is the one who brought up marriage. I just got all my stufff out of his house today and he just doesn't seem to care.
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A
female
reader, AskEve  +, writes (8 February 2007):
 I think the idea of you being his future fiance scared him. He obviously feels he's not ready to settle down and has had a good think about it all. He told you he "didn't want to get married." See what I mean? Hearing you being introduced as his future fiance has scared him. Talk to him and tell him not to worry about it. You are happy the way things are with him and are in no rush to be married.
But you do still love him and still want to be with him, if he needs some space then you'll respect that and give it to him then see what he says. You must remember if he says give him space to think about it then you MUST give him that space and tell him to call you in a few days.
Eve
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (8 February 2007):
 Okay how introduced you as the future fiancee? If it wasn't him (and that's the only way my theory works) maybe this comment made him a little commitment phobic and unsure about your future. However if it was him I totally understand why you would be feeling confused right now. I can't tell you what's going on in his head because I don't know him but after 17 months he owes you an explanation and you're well within your rights to ask for it.
CD
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