A
male
age
41-50,
*pinnaker
writes:I have a good one that I found flipping through the various internet pages. In fact it is a context to a story I had read but yet poses some interesting fodder for all of you aunts if you would kindly oblige. What would be your intereptetation of this scenario?A man, while going through internet dating profiles, happens upon a woman who's profile exudes confidence and self assurance. He reads the opposite between the lines as the aforementioned qualities seems much too contrived in his eyes. He contacts this woman and a conversation develops. They talk on the phone a few times and one night she invites him over her house late one night. He obliges, though he has some reservation of it. When he arrives at her home, many of the suspicions he has had about her were confirmed. She is a very well refined lady though she exudes a lonely quality that belays much of the confidence she has shown on her profile. As the night slipped later and later, they end up in the bedroom. They become intimate, though it did not go so far as intercourse. They remain in each other's arms the rest of the night and well into the morning. In his mind, she needed a pair of arms to hold her and ears to listen to her. That is what drew him to the ad and that is why he accepted the rather unconventional invitation for a late night get together. It pleases him most that he could reach out to this lady for he wished nothing more than to reach out to someone. In her mind she did need those things though she is unwilling to get into a relationship at this time. She wants to be careful lest she begin on an emotional roller coaster with this man even after one meeting. There exists a tremendous sexual tension and holistic curiousity between them. Most singular to me were the mans intentions of reaching out to this woman - What would be your interpretation of this man and the possible motivations behind this behavior?
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female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (29 June 2011):
Hello again. You said that they did get into bed together, but did not actually have sex.
He could be looking for just friendship and her, the same.
The two of them singularly, are most likely not using each other in any way, but more that they are perhaps keeping open minded as to whether it evolves into a boyfriend and girlfriend situation later on.
But for now though, each are not wishing to push things on too quickly - just in case it doesn't work out. Good move.
If both parties have previously been disappointed and hurt before in relationships, this would certainly explain the slight holding back from becoming too heavily involved emotionally, for the moment.
It's certainly a good way to begin, and to see how things pan out over time and really get to know each other more thoroughly - before making a decision on whether to pursue it further.
In the meantime, each is content for friendship to be the status.
Everything in good time.
A
male
reader, spinnaker +, writes (28 June 2011):
spinnaker is verified as being by the original poster of the question What about the possibilities of a relationship between these two?
She resists falling for him while he maintains his distance simply because he contacted her because he felt she needed reached in this way.
Could this be a form of womanizing but with beneficence?
Would there be a difference between using someone as an outlet for nurture and using someone as an outlet for sex?
Wondering what all of you would think...
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (27 June 2011):
 He sounds like a guy who likes to nurture, who may like to find people who are vulnerable in some way, then supply the missing tenderness in those lives.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2011): It sounds like they were both lonely and curious of eachother, seems like they both got what they wanted :)
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A
female
reader, Lucky786  +, writes (27 June 2011):
 He was curious and probably just as lonely as her.
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A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix +, writes (27 June 2011):
Hi there. Maybe it was just curiosity and nothing more.
It does sound like it.
He may have thought - "Oh well, nothing ventured, nothing gained. I'll call her up and see what happens after that. If it goes well, it goes well and if not, no big deal. If I don't do this, well then I'll never know will I?"
That's how I interpret it.
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