A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:What do you do when you realize you are in love with someone who doesn't love you back? How long do you wait before you can say it will never happen? How do you move on to someone else who CAN love you if you are in love with another?
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male
reader, Tommy7 +, writes (6 October 2007):
You need to look logically at the situation and consider the realistic possibilities. Like, is he in love with someone else? Is he capable of loving anybody? What interest in you has he shown? Can you live with his flaws?You can love more than one person. You don't need to stop loving him to move on and love someone else. You may easily find someone else you love more.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2007): I met my wife when I was 16 yrs old and she was 14 (I'm 32 now). Her parents wouldn't let her date until she was 15 so we became friends and I waited for her 15th birthday. As luck would have it she met another guy as she turned 15 and started dating him. I never told her that I had strong feelinsg for her... Long story short- we were good friends through high school and the entire time i hated life becuase she would have a serious boyfriend every year and i was to afraid to tell her how i felt.. Flash forward to 4 yrs after highschool and she is finally single. I take her to a nice restauant and then a local bar. At the bar I tell her that i had feelings for her since the day I met her. She was shocked becuase by this point I was in "friend" zone. She said something about not being over her last bf yet. Anyways, I told her i could no longer hang around her if another guy was in the picture...She had a new bf a few months later and my heart was crushed. I stayed away from her for two yrs. Then In june 2003 I emailed her that I had been missing her and hoped we could meet for dinks or something. She had a boyfriend but I had been on her mind alot (she later told me). By August 03 she had broken up with her boyfriend and started dating me. It took me 11yrs to get my first date/kiss with her. In Feb 2004 we got engaged. In jan 2005 we were married in Hawaii. In Feb 2008 our first child is due (It's a girl).For 10.5 yrs it seemed as though my wife had no romantic interest in me. She tells me now that I was so far in the friend zone that she had a hard time moving me into the potentiale mate catagory. She says now that she regrets ever being with anyone else.If I had it to do over again, I would have told her how I felt right away. The worst part of suffering while she told me about boyfriends or guys she had slept with was that I suffered quietly without her ever knowing how I felt. You MUST stay out of the friend zone. I pulled of the impossible but most guys would probably have failed.If you take anything from my story then I hope it's this. THINGS CAN AND WILL CHANGE. Just becuase the girl you want to be with right now has her sights set on someone else or just doesn't want you, doesn't mean her feelings won't change down the road. Trust me!!!
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