A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend and I have been together over a year now. I asked my boyfriend if he was serious about me. Our circumstances have not changed. He still has no job, still drinks a lot and has not hinted around any about marriage. His answer to my question was this "yes I am, I'm tired of you saying that crap and I don't know what else to do to prove it to you. I responded "nothing, I'll never mention it again". Inside I wanted to say "marry me". I love him but I stay confused half the time by his comments. He also said on our one year anniversary. "how long are you gonna stay this time"? When he was the one who left me years ago after three years of dating. What should I make of these kind of comments?
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2009): Instead of asking him if he is serious try having a talk about where the relationship is going. Tell him that you want some security. I am a person who always needs to follow a plan, you know? I cant believe you have left it this long without having one. And are you sure you want a future with somone who seems to be going nowhere? It sounds like he is sort of bitter about your relationship. You deserve to be treated better than that. It sounds to me like you are the only one who is investing anything into this relationship of yours, maybe take a step back and analyze things and decide if this is how you want to spend the rest of your life.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (10 March 2009):
I'd give him a month or two more and if he doesn't get off his bum and get a job, then move on.
Give yourself a deadline of say, the end of April, and if there is no improvement and no end to the cocky remarks then leave.
I mean, you are not happy with the way things are so find something better. There is no point sticking around if he's making snide comments, telling you to shut up and leave him alone and is unhappy himself.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (10 March 2009):
Not sure what you should make about the comments but I AM SURE I wouldn't marry the guy until he decides to pull his weight and gets gainfully employed.
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