A
female
age
41-50,
*ary20014
writes:What should I do with my husband?After 2 years with him we've just been married 1 years, he found someone who is only 18 years old, he is 23 years old when I had 3 weeks holiday. After I got back he said we break up and he can find someone else but that we still be friends. Well, no matter what I did, he still wants be friends with me.I know after we married, I gave him too much pressure and we fought a lot of the time. Maybe it was my fault... but after my holiday I wanted that to chang but I can't believe it. He started with someone else. I still love him and want him back, but I don't know is that worth it? or should I move on?....
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2009): I know this is heartbreaking, but how can you consider staying with a man that cheats on you while you are Married (vows, promises for life???better or worse) I don't see any point other than just being truthful with him: Tell him you're sorry for all the fighting and pressure, and you want to give your marriage a 2nd chance. Also you want to talk through, compromise problems rather than argue. If he looks at you in the eyes with any hope, then suggest going somewhere just to talk. If he's 'done' talking, then get some comfort from family or friends to help you move on with a divorce. Divorces take awhile, and he might have a change of heart. Every marriage deserves a 2nd chance, I believe.
A
male
reader, PeterPan  +, writes (24 February 2009):
 Hmm -- tough one... my first inclination is to say move on. See, to me, it seems like he's already made that choice for himself. I am also wondering about this desire to remain friends... to me, that suggests some level of guilt on his part.
As far as giving too much pressure on him, that's always debatable. I suppose it depends on what you were discussing/fighting over. But, that's all water under the bridge. My impression suggests that your husband needs to grow up some.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2009): Hi this is tricky. It depends if you want to move on.
I think you want him back i think you should say; look i am sorry for what happened before, but i believe we deserve a better chance - if you an x don't work out, then can we try again for the love that we had before.
IF he says no - really no and he is enjoying being with her then yes you have to move on. It will hurt. But you will have done the right thing for this person that you love, even though it hurts you.
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