A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I was with an amazing girl for 4 months. We sadly knew it would end at some stage because she was out here in Africa on a gap year teaching at one of the local schools. She had to go back to UK to finish University and I was just starting out my career. Im 23 and shes 19 by the way.I felt we connected on so many levels. We had quite an intense relationship and I know she loves and cares for me and as do I. Her last month was the the most romantic because we let our feelings for one another pour out! I have always wondered, "what if we met when we were roughly at the same stage in life?" I just had the feeling in my gut, that she was Miss Right, just not Miss Right right now!I would want to give it another go! She didnt want to have a long distance relationship because we would only see each other every 3 months and I wouldnt always be around for her, also she would have to wait for the physical contact!She is the type of girl that I would have wanted to have a serious relationship with! I know she misses me because she keeps talking to my sister who is around the same age as her. She keeps asking my sister about how Im doing and how much she misses me. She also told my sister that she has never been treated so well by a man in her life and says that I am an amazing guy!I am going to visit her in a few weeks and she wants to spend time with me and introduce me to the parents! Even though we are not together anymore!My question is how should I handle being around her on the visit? Should I try get back with her or just let it go? Also she says that whatever happens between us we will still be really good friends! Why would she still want to be friends with me when Im still madly in love with her? IS she just trying to let me go softly or would she keep me around to see if we get back together in the future?
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get back together, long distance, university Reply to this Question
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male
reader, rivi  +, writes (14 June 2010):
The logic would be to have a complete break : any attempt to remain 'friends' just won't work and it will postpone the day when you can not be miserable and start relating to other women.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks Rivi, another question is "Should I stay friends with her and keep in contact or just try and forget about her?" Has been on my mind since she has been gone!
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A
male
reader, rivi +, writes (14 June 2010):
I think that at 19 she realizes it is too soon for her to settle permanently for the first man she has fallen for - and she-s trying to convey that to you gently.
If I were you I would not prolong the agony by going to see her again. She wants to be free to date some of the new men she is going to meet at university and who lets face it will be able to satisfy her sexual needs on a regular basis - as she will theirs - .
I think you should put this affair down to experience - a good one after all - and move on in your life and loves.
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