A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I'm 13 years old and there's a girl i'm really in love with but i don't know if she feels the same way about me and i've tried getting advice and its all stuff like just ask her out and see if she says yes and all that but i am a really shy guy and i sometimes get so nervous that i can hardly talk to her. Me and her are friends but i just don't know what to do and i need help so if anyone would give some advice it would be greatly appreciated.Thanks
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male
reader, KingLeo  +, writes (2 December 2007):
 Well, the other answer about having a friend ask isn't a bad one, but it works better for girls who are shy. Deep, slow breathing and confidence are a must. Women like men who can express themselves, are confident and take action.Being rather shy growing up I've always found that if I can get the girls full attention on me, and she is fascinated with what I'm saying, I'm in. A great way to do this is to ask her to just go and do something and don't necessarily make it a date. Just hangout and get comfortable talking with her. If you both have fun, seriously ask her for a date. Somethings i've used in the past include; ask her a question, walk her home, show her my drawings, work on a group project, see a show, see a movie, play a sport, study, have lunch, walk her to her locker/class. It can really be anything! Get her talking!!If she accepts the offer, you are almost guaranteed a date, unless she has a boyfriend already. If she declines your offer, you wont feel like a loser because she still hasn't said no to a date or to you, just to the activity. Only If she is complete bitch trying to impress her friends will she humiliate you. and in this case, why would you want to date her anyways? Remember, the WORST that can come of asking her is you wont get a date, which is the same the BEST thing that happens if you don't. Trust me, its much worse when she gets asked out by the kid with male pattern balding a minute before you ask her out, and the only reason she says no to you is because she already told him yes.....if I had only asked the day before...Chances are that she likes you and you should go for it.
A
female
reader, crazyone +, writes (2 December 2007):
 Hummmm....well.Since your shy. Why don't you ask one of your CLOSE friends to see what she thinks about you. That way you don't have to walk up to her and ask and also you can't really do anything wierd around her to make her think your'e wierd.I hope I helped.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2007): I used to be like you. The only way your gonna grow or be rewarded is by sucking it up and taking the chance of asking her out or telling her how you feel. Before I asked a girl out I always needed to work up some steam first. Anything that increases adrenaline I found to be very good like loud death metal. I would do pushups and situps and other excersises to steal myself first. Deep breathing is also very good and relaxing. When your talking directly to her try tightening your abdomen area as it keeps blood flow to your head and makes you less nervous. It is important that you speak in a confident tone. I find women respond well to a man with confidence. Act like a soldier preparing for battle. And most importantly do not over think the situation when the time comes to tell her how you feel. Once you feel the timing is right do not back out. Walk up to her with dilagence. Keep your message consise and don't ramble.If you really can't talk to her at this point in time, try writing to her. I used to write poetry and every girl I ever wrote very flattering poerty to, has melted with happieness. If you go that rought you have to understand that she will probably be nervous afterward. And you will still need to confront her later. If this happens, be casual afterwards. You want to seem eager for her in the poem but not over eager for her afterwards. Overeagerness will kill your self-confidence. Good luck and let me know how you do.
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