A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Dear CupidI'm with my current bf for 8 months. When we started he texted often, called often now we barely talk during week days. Though we meet on week ends he do his things like playing games (mostly) or reading about cars or watching shows about cars. I don't play games and I tried to play with him once or twice didn't like the type of games he plays and I'm definitely not interested in knowing in depth details about cars. We don't go out side, most of the week ends we won't even step outside the house. Sex is good between us.He doesn't like living together even if we are together for 2 hours since he wants his space. Almost all of his friends are married and he has no intention to marry or have kids. I'm not interested in marriage or kids, so it's not a deal breaker for me.Lately I feel that he doesn't want any commitment, btw his longest relationship was 1 year. Am i trying to find trouble? I kind of feel bored not doing anything, I'm kind of person who needs constant communication and fun. Talked to him, he said he won't change, that's how he is. I like him, but I don't see any passion coming from him or from me to him. What should I do, please help.
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (30 December 2016):
 I think you know what you should do but you are scared to admit it. He has no intentions off changing. He wants a part time girlfriend but still do his own thing. I wouldn't be happy in a relationship like this anyway, it would not be enough for me. He is just not willing to grow up. He wants to be independent and well that is okay it's not fair on you to be expected to just be ther at weekends for sex.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2016): His longest relationship ever is 1 year - WOW! If that doesn't say there's something wrong with him at his age (30-35) I don't know what does. Did that include him living under the same roof with that person for a year? I say he's not only DULL BORING, but using you since he wants his own space after 2 hours of you visiting him on week-ends.He's totally not interested in your kind of fun or interested in you... his idea of fun is to play games, watch TV, you have sex with him and leave! I think that sounds more like friends with benefits?What you should do is move on... if you already know what you want in and from a guy, then don't settle for less and stay with someone who doesn't deliver.Plus for the future; try and have hobbies of your own to keep you amused and that you can offer to the relationship rather than always depending on the guy to be Captain Entertainment. Take Care - CAA
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (20 December 2016):
 I think a guy in his 30's whose longest relationship was 12 months is just simply NOT a good BF. Sounds like he is a little stuck in a teenage behavior. He likes having a GF and that is why he put in a BIT of effort in the beginning with texting and calling often. Now that he HAS a gf (you) and get sex on a regular basis he is FINE with status quo.
He is in his 30's and wants to spend his time WITH YOU playing computer games and watch car shows... Really? What do you get out of that? Some decent sex, but not much else?
Are you OK with these little crumbs?
Do you have a social life outside of him? Friends you go out with, do things with?
Do you have hobbies or interests that take you away from home?
If not, maybe it's time you start thinking about things to do that makes YOU happy.
YOU two share very little (I think) in common other than not wanting marriage and kids. So really what can he talk/text about? You obviously aren't interested in his hobbies and he doesn't seem to care much that YOU might have hobbies of your own. And since you STILL stick around for these weekend visits he knows that he doesn't HAVE to put in an effort with you to get you to stick around.
It seems more like an f-buddy relationship than an actual ADULT relationship.
Do you really see a future with him? THIS is who he is.
You can LIKE someone and NOT be in a relationship with them. Why settle for a guy there really isn't much of a future with? Even if you don't want marriage and kids (which is fine) you seem to want to live together and BE together more than just on weekends. He doesn't. Again, he is happy with status quo. He gets sex on a regular basis and YOU aren't seemingly expecting or wanting much in return.
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