A
female
age
41-50,
*ngelheartjosh
writes:Hello,My question is, I'm confused about my x, we broke up about a year ago...we didn't see each other for the whole year, we were under strict rules not to, after the year was up he came right to me, told me how much he had missed me, loved me wanted to be with me, he cried to me, he was sorry that so much time had gone by that we were apart. I told him it was a good thing that we grew as adults and matured and learned from our past.We do love each other very much he has been working very hard which before he did not have a job.well he still lives with his live in GF who is much older than us we are 35 she is 46 he is not in love with her, and was planning on leaving her to come home to me, we kept in contact for about 3 weeks and I didn't sleep with him, I told him not untill he left her that I would he respected that, I seen him about 3 times and we talked on phone everyday for 3 weeks, he had even told me he told her he was leaving her cause he is still in love with me....He has been with this woman for 7 years she treats him like it's her son, he says though when he is with me and my son I make him wanna be a man and go to work and tAKE care of us, rather than a woman taking care of him. Well after the 3 weeks he told me he had to tie up loose ends with her pay some bills he was also getting layed off I believe not sure, and after he would be coming home to myself and my son. I never heard from him again that was 1 month ago I am so confused as to why???? Why did he say he wanted to be a man and tell her he was leaving her to come to me?? But at the same time couldn't tell me he chose to stay with her??? He never told me anything!!! Someone please help me see from the outside in, what really happened here? Thank you.
View related questions:
broke up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (9 June 2011):
I am sorry you have been so hurt by him. I just hope now that you can move on from him. You deserve more than this.
A
female
reader, angelheartjosh +, writes (9 June 2011):
angelheartjosh is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you for all that responded...I have not heard from him again.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2011): I feel sorry for his common law wife and you as well. He is spinning this bulldust and you both eat it up.
Of course he is "not a man" he is merely a coward who is basically a gigolo.
LoveGirl
...............................
A
female
reader, hannah76 +, writes (16 May 2011):
 Hello,
It's a familiar pattern and I believe he will be back and he will be so convincing that you'll be back where you started. But he will never truly be there for you. He won't leave and he will never be committed only to you. Use an iron will and never never contact him again or respond. You are waisting valuable years on this man.
...............................
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (16 May 2011):
 Life is tough, and it's so nice to have a sugar mama that makes going to work an optional, since you can always fall back on her. For some people, it's even nicer than "true love ".
Mind you, not that I believe he loves you, he's just good at telling you what you want to hear. But even if he did, 7 years he got it so easy , little or no chances he gives that up.
...............................
A
female
reader, chocoholicforever  +, writes (16 May 2011):
He's all talk, you can't trust his words. He came to you wanting to get back, crying to you and so on...while he was still living with his girlfriend?? why hadn't he broken up with her first and then come looking for you?
if he's with her because she takes care of him (so he doesn't have to take care of himself), he's too dependent. Whoever happens to be in the better position to take care of his needs, will be whoever he is "with." He stayed with her for years even though he wasn't in love with her, but because she took care of his needs. Now you have been fulfilling some of his other needs (namely the need to feel manly when he really isn't much of one).
it's better that he doesn't come back, even if he did he's not reliable, he may leave again when he decides he doesn't want to work anymore. he's a poor male role model for your son.
...............................
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (16 May 2011):
He'll never leave her. Don't you see? The guy's a moocher. He lives off one woman, and is trying to get another to have sex with him. Thankfully, you didn't give in this time - and look what happened, he cut contact.
The guy's a bum, and he'll never be there for you. Move on.
...............................
|
