A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I’d really appreciate a male perspective on this please.Have you ever had a one night stand with a woman and then become really good friends with her afterwards?I don’t understand what would motivate a guy to keep in touch, as a friend, after a one night encounter. Especially when he said how great the sex was and how much he enjoyed it; surely he’d either want to hook-up again or would not keep in contact. I’d ask him why, but we live very far apart and our conversations are via msn so it would be hard to gauge first reaction. Any suggestions please as to why my one-night guy is suddenly my new best friend? It’s really frustrating especially when I have to listen to him talk to me about other woman!
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best friend, msn, one night stand Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2009): Guys always want to keep easy girls who have one-night stands on the back burner just in case.... No mystery.
A
male
reader, ALONSO80  +, writes (5 May 2009):
I had a one night stand with a girl last year. It was probably the best sex I ever had She was going through a rough time in her marriage, but she was separated from her husband. We hit it off and became good friends, we had sex a couple times after that but then we stopped and just became friends. she got back with her husband and I respected that. I call her once in a while but I have noo feelings towards her and I am sure she doesn't either, she loves her husband now though
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2009): Sorry to answer as a female, but I thought I could provide some insight. Btw, most guys don't give away their secrets, particularly in this matter.
My rule is to never have a one night stand. One night stands almost always serve the man for a mere few minutes.
I've had sex on the second date, and because I had no interest in anything past that, I didn't call or communicate to him. This was a new thing for him. He didn't understand why I wasn't responding to his calls or pursuing him.
It's because he was used to the one night stands and not following up. I just didn't need him for more than sex, so even though he was hot and nice and all that, I didn't need his companionship, I wasn't in the market nor was I needy.
He pursued me HARD because I showed no desire or neediness to have a relationship, and that was something he was not used to, and appreciated the independence and confidence.
What motivated him was my attitude that I didn't need him.
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