A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Dating is when you go out with someone...and having a boyfriend is like a relationship...but how do you really know when you love that person...does it mean that you know that that person is the person you want to spend your life with...does it mean that its just romantic all the time?? or does it mean you can work with that person all the time????? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, idoneitagain  +, writes (17 February 2007):
Love is a feeling you get. You know when you are in love when you feel it. How do you know when you are hungry? Or in pain? Its a feeling you have, a direct experience. The feeling of love is the same.
This feeling comes from the awareness we have that we recognise the precious nature and experience of life in the other person in the same way we value our own lives. When we can experience the joy of life through another person, that is the experience of love.
You are wise at your age to recognise that being in a relationship is different to being in love. Relationships will most probably come and go, but love can remain even when a relationship is over. That is ok. You can love someone as long as you can see or feel the value or joy of life through them.
There are lots of different ideas on what love is, these ideas are just a few. You will discover your own thoughts on it too, as you go through life. Just remember to love as much as possible, whenever you feel you can. That's really what life is all about.
Good luck!
A
female
reader, AskEve  +, writes (16 February 2007):
 You are still very young to experience true love but this is the way I describe it.
If you truly love someone then you respect them for who they are, warts and all. You want to look after them and protect them, you look out for them and put them first. You feel happy and content in their company and enjoy being together. Above all you can be yourself when you're with them. You never try to be anything more or someone different because you don't need to. You don't have to impress them to win them over and you never have to play games to make them like you. There is trust and understanding on both sides and you feel safe and secure within yourself. You would never undermine them, they are not someone in whose company you feel threatened or small. They are someone with whom you can share your innermost thoughts and worries, a person with whom you should be able to share anything, they are your friend and your confidante and you can be honest with them at all times, you can tell them anything because they love you as you are.
He/she may be someone who is the direct opposite of you. On the surface you may seem like chalk and cheese. Whilst you may be loud and forceful they may be quiet and thoughtful. You may come from different backgrounds, different countries or be twenty years apart but this doesn't matter. There is an unspoken language between you, the spiritual connection between you both is so deep that you seem to be able to communicate without even speaking to each other. You are happy to lie in silence together. You feel sometimes that there is no need to talk because you feel that you know what they are thinking anyway. You feel so close to them that sometimes you think you could almost read their mind. You know when they are worried, in pain, or sad just by looking at them. It is as though there exists some kind of telepathy between you.
Real love stands the test of time, you laugh together, cry together and even have your differences but this doesn't matter, you love that person AND their failings. You come together in a crisis and work through things together and this just brings you closer. You take their feelings into consideration in all that you do. They are the most important person in your life!
Deep or what huh? Some people find true love right away, others never find it. The main thing (at your age) is to have fun and enjoy getting to know the one you're with. I hope this helps.
Eve
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