A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hello. I've been seeing a wonderful girl almost 3 months and a third now, it's the longest i've ever had a relationship with anyone (how much of a stud am I?). Anyway i had liked her for months and months before i finally asked her on hearing that she might actually like me and she said yes. Anyway on to what's upsetting me at the moment. I'm kind of a myspace freak, so i'm always on, she is too. Anyway you know those survey quiz type things that people take and then post in a bulletin? She took one of those and one of the questions was: 3. Is anyone in love with you? "no". That really did worry me because i'm almost positive that i am indeed in love with her. I did some research, and it's really hard to decode this stuff lol. I really do care for her so much though, and there's not a day that goes by that i find myself thinking about her really deeply. I'm prepared to give her anything i mean, i give her money and buy her things because i want to make her really happy. And now she's telling ME what I feel. When I'm positive i'm IN love with her. My feelings for her are so strong. I can't stay angry at her for over like, 10 mins. And if i ever am angry at her i find myself apologising to myself. I never get angry or lash out at her when she's around or anything though, except once....because she didn't wanna go into a comic shop lol. She happend to get regular mood swings and all that hormonal stuff. And her..y'know, time of the month is particularly nervracking. She tells me she almost ALWAYS cries on her period after me becoming paranoid about her unhappiness and crying. So that relieved me. Anyway I've kinda drifted from the point. Could someone tell me if I'm IN love, or if i just love her. I'd really really really appreciate it. And if it turns out I'm not, (which i'd find really hard to believe) then could you describe to me the differences between love and being IN love in a way a 15 year old boy could, if it's not really difficult or anything. I hope I didn't sound arrogant or self pitying in that pathetic question. Cheers.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2008): He was "IN LOVE" with me for four years and i finally gave him a chance.We were able to talk on the phone and stuff but when we just see each other in person we just cant associate with each other.One minute u can be "IN LOVE" with someone than the next minute you just have "LOVE."You can give them so many chances and they just cant make up their mind whether or not to be "IN LOVE" with you or to just "LOVE" you.
A
female
reader, sxcarshalz +, writes (5 January 2008):
Well im in love and th feeling that i get is someone who you couldnt picture your life without, without that someone everything wouldnt make sense, someone who you miss all the time someone who you can see yourself marrying, having children with sharing your life together. As for wat she wrote make her feel like you are in love with her treat her like shes your queen be romantic. And i dont think you need someone to tell you that your in love you sound like you are! googd luck
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (5 January 2008):
In the Bible , there are three kinds of love, Eros, Philia and Agape.
When you say that you are in love , it is usually 'eros' because this kind of love will give you fuzzy feelings, strong sensual feeling, bothering on the obsessions about a person.This kind of love depends on perceptions and circumstances.When harsh words or actions happen, this love will disappear.
Philia love is the love of friendship, best friends, and the fellowship with people you enjoy.This love does not last with time, distance or harsh words occur.
Agape love is the highest love. You love someone no matter what happens and the love stays no matter what circumstance or situations. Just like your parents love you and they do not expect anything in return from you.
At your age, there is puppy love and infatuations .You are crazy about her and think of her all the time. True love do not have those heightened feelings. Just like you love your parents or sisters.You don't think of them all the time but deep down you know you will always love them no matter how.
You are in love with her and you think you love her but you know her only in so short a time. It could be physical love or attractions.True love need to be tested by the passage of time.If you find in time , you grow more and more fond of her under whatever circumstances , then it is true love.
In the meantime ,it could just be puppy love or just infatuations at your age.
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A
female
reader, chica_23 +, writes (5 January 2008):
I see where you are coming from. My first long term boyfriend was also at 15. He would tell me he loved me, but i couldnt answer. Maybe the problem is that she's not ready to openly admit the fact of love. It is a very big step. As to the difference love is when u cant stop thinking of someone, when all you want is to please them, but being in love is a feeling that comes and when it does you will know. Dont try to understand why she put no one loved her because as a girl i can tell you in that area we are complicated. Just make sure, she knows you love her, and give her time.
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