A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Guys, can you explain this to me? Is it important to you that when a woman goes down on you, she lets you cum in her mouth and swallows it? What is the difference if she doesn't swallow? Is that a mind thing or something physical? A male friend once told me he would be deeply hurt if he had a gf who wouldn't swallow. I thought he's weird, because how can he tell the difference? Does his penis magically know where his cum goes? Is that so important? But it seems that my own bf would also really like me to do that. I'm torn, because on one hand, I love him so much and I like to please him, on the other hand, I am worried that this has something to do with degrading me? Or is this supposed to be something like a proof that I love him? Or what is it about?
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for your answers. I agree with youwish, I also think this male friend has some issues. My bf is an amazing lover, amazing guy on top of that. I know swallowing would be one of his fantasies, so I would like to do that for him, but he never applied any pressure on me to do that. I suppose now that maybe for him it would mean something like honeypie said.. that I'm comfortable with all of him. Because he's totally comfortable with my body and body fluids and I have to admit it's an amazing feeling and I never thought someone could be so easy-going.
A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (20 September 2014):
 I don't think you can get a better answer than Honeypie's.
I wanted to comment on the guy friend who said that he's be "deeply hurt" if she didn't swallow. For him, it's all about ego. He considers his semen as his expression of manhood, and her spitting it out is a rejection of it.
To me, that would actually be a red flag if I were dating a guy. For him to take things this personally spells a lot of trouble in a relationship with him. What is next, him being deeply hurt because she doesn't like anal? Or being deeply hurt she doesn't make the noises HE wants her to make during sex? No way man. Men aren't entitled to have women bend over backwards to be their ego proppers.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2014): I don't personally care once the job's done it's done. But I imagine it can be something blokes like as simply is kinda kinky to know a women enjoys the 'gunk' .
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (20 September 2014):
 I think (I can't really speak for men though) that swallowing means you are COMFORTABLE with ALL of him (even his gunk) - that you find sex natural and sees swallowing as part of it. Some women sees it as a turn on, some even as a power thing (not for the guy, but for the woman ).
And then you have the other side who thinks it's gross or degrading. Some think that guys want it because PORN dictates that it is HOT. HOT for the guy, not the girl. Same with "facials" or on the chest/back whatnot.
WITH THAT said, I don't think ANYONE should swallow their partners gunk, if it isn't a TOTAL turn on for HER. You can use a tissue and wipe it off/out of your mouth without SPITTING it out.
I DO think that SOME MEN are so focused on the notion BECAUSE they believe the PORN hype, THAT is how a GOOD blowjob should end, REGARDLESS of whether the woman LIKES it or not. WANTS it or not. AND THAT is not degrading, that is DISRESPECT.
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A
male
reader, unknown2u +, writes (20 September 2014):
Personally I don't care too much between spitting and swallowing. What's important to me is the priviledge of being allowed to cum in her mouth. It's just a completely different experience if she pulls away before the end.
Now when you're young, living with respective parents, and can't really have an open sexual relationship the "no mess" aspect of swallowing is handy. But if you're older and the mess isn't an issue? Then swallowing is nice but not important.
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