A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: After 1 year my ex returned to me. He dumped me for another girl. I was very hurt at that time. But when he came back to me I forgave him.He loved me a lot after reunion. But dont know what happened to me I always blamed him for his past. He tried to convince me that it was his mistake.Even I tried to make him feel insecured.When he started his new business he was so busy that he could not give me time.I shouted at him because of this.After that he broke up with me again.I accepted, I cut all the contacts with him. but after that I got to know that he called one of our mutual friend and said that he broke up with me because of my same nature.I didnt chang.I could not understand him.One day his business parter called me up.But i culdnot receive his phone.After one month I tried to contact him.He was busy at that time so he was not able to receive my phone.Afet 1 hour he called me up and said that he got a missed call from my no.I was shocked.I asked him about his life.He replied me.But he was very angry.Then I hang up the ph.Next day when I tried to contact him he didnt received my ph.I sent him text. he didnt replied.I said sorry to him but he didnot response.After that I called his business partner.He said to give him some space. After that I stopped calling him.Even since one month he didnt contact me.Please tell me what should I do?Should I contact him again?will he contact me if I follow no contact rule?Whats going on in his mind?is he still interested in me?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2011): hi.! I don't want tell u what should u do. I just want to tell what may be going in his mind.
First of all he liked you. He wants to grow that relationship with you. But something just went wrong, maybe ur behaviour or maybe what he was expecting from u is not what he got. It maybe his or ur problem. Set this apart, no one can help it.
Then he moves to another girl, ofcourse, he is not getting what he wants from u, so he venture out for better option. Now, the "better" option either dumped him or he felt that this new girl is not a better option(as compare to u).
He comes back to u for 3 reasons, he likes u, & he now feels u were a better option & he can either change u or adjust himself to your that particular "behaviour". Also there maybe case that he didn't find anyone so he comes to u.
Now again he left u,..!! That's the problem. Now he is simply fed up with ur behaviour. He tried a lot but can't change u nor he can't adjust himself. Now u will think u hv the root of problem. But it is not right, its just that u two r simply not compatable. In the whole event u r available for him throughout so u r willing but he is not.
Now if u go for him, he will think,"she need me, she like me so much that she can't go anywhere, she is helpless". Now he will never think in that same way. He has gone.
U may blame urself but its not like that. U also hv adjusted for him, but he's not. Now its upto u, what u want? Can u really change that behaviour & still if u change will he come back & still if comes, will he give same respect to u.??
A
female
reader, VSAddict +, writes (26 July 2011):
I think the best thing to do is to leave him alone and let him call you. Calling him constantly is going to push him away even more, especially since you two aren't together.
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