A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have absolutely no idea what to think about this guy. This guy is the co-owner of a bistro that is next to my work, a place that I eat at when I work (I started because there's nowhere else to eat over a 30min. break in the area!) I'm 18 and I would say that he is probably in his early 20's. He is very kind and friendly, but quiet. (Not shy, just... doesn't say that much, he's still confident, though). He's not as talkative as the owner, to anyone, not even his coworkers. He doesn't usually talk to customers besides taking their orders, and that's how it is for me on occasion (although he does make little comments that don't really mean anything - i.e. when I walked over without my coat in freezing weather he asked if I was cold, he wished me a merry Christmas in case he wasn't going to see me again before Christmas, etc. - just simply being friendlier than he is to other customers just like the other guys who work there, since I'm a regular). However, sometimes he is extra attentive to me; he has put his hand on the small of my back when asking me what I needed, if I even stand up he'll ask what I need (or won't ask, he'll just read my mind and get what I need), he's allowed me to repay the bistro another day because I accidentally let my bank account go empty (how embarrassing). Sometimes though, its not like that at all! I think part of it is if the owner is there, as he seems to ignore me a bit when the owner is there (the owner is a very nice, friendly guy, by the way, which is why I wonder), but I think there's more to it. Sometimes he just avoids eye contact, hardly says anything, etc. If you are simply being a friendly person, isn't it kind of strange to change your behavior for no obvious reason toward one specific person? From what I can tell he seems more friendly to me (when he is friendly... or ignores me more), but that could always be because I'm a regular.I know that sometimes I can be a little bit confident but then the next day be afraid of showing how I feel (feeling like I made a fool of myself before) which will cause me to unintentionally ignore someone I like, when in reality all I want to do is talk to them. Is this the same?What on earth is this guy doing? Is it me?
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female
reader, dorothy2342 +, writes (1 January 2010):
 I have to add another reason here, if he seems to ignore you when the owner is there he might be concerned for his job or he might have a relatiionship with him. If you are that interested in him take the chance and ask him if he would like to go to coffee or the movies your treat. Either way you will have your answer. Don't waste your time on a man that doesn't know what he wants. Happy hunting.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2010): he could just have things on his mind, if you like this guy ask him out :)
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2010): I see one of two options happening here. He could be interested and just be a little shy.
Or, quite possibly, he is just being nice to a loyal customer that he has seen time and again. There are a few places that I frequent for lunch while working, I have gotten to know the owners and their staff. They are quite friendly to me and talk more to me than other customers, and I read nothing in that.
In this case, it is really hard to judge. I would give it a 50/50. Maybe, if you are interested in the guy, invite him for coffee or to sit and talk with you a bit. If not, I wouldn't worry since he seems pretty passive.
Just my $.02
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