A
male
age
30-35,
*mit thakur
writes:hiso i have met a girl online, she is from another country and we became friends, she suffers from mild depression, but she is very nice and beautiful and i really like her, i wont say i love her because i know its not possible to fall in love online but i really do like her, i always keep thinking about her and wishing her to be happy and want every problems in her life to go awayeven though we had agreed on no romantic relationships, we have made this relation as friends with benefit sort of, many times we have talked sexually and done sex chats for fun and we enjoy it, we dont wanna get romanticaly involved because there is a chance we may never met,but from some days, i have became protective of her, whenever she says she is meeting a man or a guy , i feel like that guy will turn out a creep and might stalk her and use her, i am not jealous or possesive, i know one day she will meet a guy and maybe make a bf there, i am worried that she may get in danger, she is just 17 and i worry that since she is not emotionally stable, she wont be able to distance herself from such men and they all will use her,like yesterday she told me how taxi driver was holding her hand tightly and today she told me she is meeting a counceller who is a guy,so this thought keeps coming in my mind that what if those guys turn out creeps and i wont be able to protect her, and i dont want anything to happen to heri know its wrong for me to judge all males and not everyone is bad, and i should let her be independent and be self aware but i couldnt help this feeling and i dont know why i feel like it, why do i always feel she will fall for a wrong guy and men will use her ,specially use her for sex and then blackmail her, how do i escape this feeling?any help will be appreciated
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (28 September 2015):
 Amit, have you ever watched the MTV show "Catfish"? I ask because you do seem very attached to a person you've never met, and you seem to believe her story without much contemplation.
Let me point out to you that your age range shows as 22-25, so if this person really is 17 years old, you are one of those older people who may be taking advantage of her.
Having sexy chats with a 17 year old with self-reported depression, while she reports her encounters with other men, Amit, is not a good idea.
The best thing you can do to advise her is to tell her to stay off the internet until she's old enough and well enough emotionally to handle it, and to not engage in sex chats with you or with other men.
The reason I have mentioned that show, "Catfish," is to alert you to the possibility that you are the one who is being naive, and being used.
You could be chatting with a 45 year old married housewife, or with a 34 year old man who is gay but needs to explore his sexuality.
Amit, perhaps the healthiest thing for you to do for 'her' is to tell her that you don't wish to be part of the chain of men who are using her for sex, and to tell her to tell her parents she needs help.
Then move on.
I would encourage you to find a way to interact with people in real life, not on the internet. Turn off the computer, smartphone or tablet and go out into the world.
Best wishes.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2015): i think you should slow down your contact sessions as it is increasing your anxiety.You dont know this girl at all really.You only know how she presents herself online.You say she has had some sex chats but for all you know she may have chosen ghe sex trade as a lifestyle and a living.Your emotions are technically wasted and as you become increasingly dependent on her for communication and sex chat you will become increasingly likely to end up as a sucker ! Some one who is so emotionally invested that they start sending rescue money!Think it over.
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