A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am baffled by this man's behavior.We are friends but recently I've grown rather fond of him and begin to see him in a romantic light. He is a rather unusual 24 yr old, deep in academia and frankly, one of the biggest nerds and social recluse you'll ever meet. We get along fairly well and have gone on to very date-like outings such as concerts/plays, restaurants, ice-skating etc. However, just before winter break he disappeared for a month, did not reply to two of my emails and basically fell off the face of earth. I was devastated, and thought he was taken aback by my increasingly flirtatious behavior. He re-appeared a month and a half later, and begged for my forgivance, telling me that he was too busy to reply to my emails, which asked him to go out on another outing. I replied by telling him how deeply disappointed I was in his behavior, which he responded with more apologies. In the end we settled for a truce. In our most recent outing, he told me a lot about his childhood and his social awkwardness. and did some rather un-characteristically flirtatious things. Such as telling me he thinks I'm cute, put his arm around my shoulder and rub my hands to warm them up... Is there any way that these things are done platonically? I really don't think so...I am not quite sure about the disappearing for a month and a half then return, sweeter than ever act and would like some feedback.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2009): This guy sounds like me without the firends, but he feels ashamed and defensive. As if he were trying to cover something. I don't know what! It could be some harmless that he's self conscience about. This would explain the 180 degree turn behaviour. Another explaination could be during the winter break he was involved with another woman that he had feelings for, and she finally came around to him. He didn't answer your emails because he was so taken by this woman that he felt commited. Well fast forward, something happened to their relationship, and he realized that the only thig he needs, all he ever wanted, was right under his nose the whole time. You!This is complete speculation. I know nothing about him so please remember that I'm on the outside looking in.
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