A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm 22 years old and have been with my boyfriend for nearly 4 years, and my dream and wish is for us to move into our own home together, i have a job and some money behind me and he doesnt have a job or any savings, i feel so upset and i feel he doesnt want want me anymore because he hasnt made a move to move into a home with me or get a job for a start. He tells me he wants to get a house with me but thats the end of it.And i also feel i want a baby. I've never felt like this before in my life, i was never a baby person and now i feel like i want a baby of our own. I feel so envy of his sister and other girls who are pregnant, im scared to tell my boyfriend this would be another dream of mine, obviously i cant as he doesnt even have a job but i feel like i want to settle down move into a home and have a child. We baby shop for his sister and i dont like it, i would rather baby shop for a child of my own.I dont feel wanted or loved because I dont feel my boyfriend wants this with me, i feel sort of neglected. i hint about a baby, i know for a fact he wouldnt want one, even if he did have a job everyone around me seems to be pregnant or have baby and im feel envy.I also feel like if i dont have a baby, i would love to save up money and get a morgage and make a house mine one day, i would keep saving money intill i work and i would love feel secuare and have a real place of my own, my boyfriend doesnt want this, he says we are to young and it would take forever to save up money to buy a house and we should rent out a council house instead first as we dont even have a home, this is the guy i wanted to be with intill i die and i love him but why doesnt he want anything i want and i feel neglected?
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (1 October 2010):
 Well good luck and it will be hard for a while to get over him, but through time you will feel so much better and you will then be ready to meet someone new and get what you deserve, good luck and all the best in the future.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi aunt honesty, thanks for your reply. Your right this is what every girl wants. He complains that any job he has is national minimum wage and he said he couldnt afford a house with this wage, my mother and father are moving house and i've offered him my mothers house to move in with me and make it our own home, this was his idea at first but he changed his mind now he doesnt want this, he doesnt like my area i live in apparently. I asked him why he doesnt save any money he doesnt know whats around the corner and his reply is he had nothing to save for when i save all my money and hes surprised i have so much, i think your right its time to cut my ties with him no matter how much it hurts i want someone to love me and want all these things with me , he claims he does want all these things with me however does nothing to prove it and show me hes serious we have been together for 4 years and there isn't a move in anything. Not even a holiday together.
He takes me out baby shopping for his friend, to buy her new baby some clothing but he doesnt even make commitments to me and its what i want. I'm cutting ties, and its over i think im sure this is the right decision. Thank you for your reply it helped me realise.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (28 September 2010):
I guess this is what every girl wants isnt it, there own home, a good guy a child, basically there own family. Hunni the both of you are in complete different stages of your life you have your head screwed on you no what you want and he doesnt. Maybe sit him down have a serious talk tell him you want someone that will commit to you and show that they are serious and build a home together, yes this obviously cant happen as he has no money, but he needs to go and get a stable job and save, mind you the economy is quite hard at the moment to find work so i cant blame him, but he needs to be trying everyday to look for work. If even the both of you could rent a house at the minute and make it your own at least that would be you compromising. As for the baby you really need to be 100% happy as a couple before you concider having children as there is no going back once you get pregnant. You really need to sort out if you are going to give him a chance to get his act together or cut your ties with him and go on the dating scene again, good luck
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