A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:what do you do when you love someone you can never have? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2007): It hurts... a lot. I know, because I am going through the same thing right now. I know I will never be with this person, but no matter what I turn my attention to, it always comes back to him. There is some very good advice here and I will try to take it, but I have a feeling that some things are just a matter of time. So I guess we just weather this storm.
A
male
reader, Zim  +, writes (20 September 2007):
 Unrequited love is a problem i'm sure we all have in our lives at some point. I've certainly had it and I agree its not fun. However, one of the most important lessons I have learnt is that if someone doesn't like you back there's no point forcing the issue.
But another thing is the fact that you feel you are in love. Love in its simplest terms is a very close friendship with physical attraction. Sometimes even physical attraction is not even required. However, a relationship requires two-way attraction (be it intellectual, beauty, humour etc.). Longing after this guy will not change the fact that you cannot have him, so what is the point of thinking of him in that way? The advice to give in this situation is to move on, but, I know its difficult. Start looking at other guys that you might find attractive, you might find that the feelings for this guy go. It will be a long struggle, but you'll get there.
But, one thing I would like to ask is, why is he unattainable? Obviously if he has a girlfriend then its best that you move on i'm afraid. If he doesn't however and for instance you feel that he's above your league, well I think we can give some advice on asking him out.;-)
I hope this helps. Please feel free to ask more questions if necessary.
ZIM
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A
female
reader, dearkelja +, writes (20 September 2007):
 Somehow you need to find out why you love this person. How does he make you feel. What are his traits, qualities, etc that you are attracted to. When you know, you then need to sell yourself on why you can't have this person and try to move on. Look for someone else who can make you feel this way. You obviously have the capability to love someone and you should not waste that gift on what can not be. I'm sorry for your loss. If it makes you feel any better, many of us can not be with someone we love.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2007): You continue to love them, but move on in the process.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2007): You smack yourself in the face so that you can snap back into reality. Once you have joined us again (over here in reality) you find yourself someone who DOES love you back and let go of this illusion that you have created entirely in your own mind. Come back to the real world dear.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2007): i wish i knew the answer to this one, i'm in the same predicament...but i am not giving up hope. i love someone so much i keep praying that one day it will work out that i will be with her. Someone said once that love always finds a way.
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