A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i am really shy about my body. its not curvy and nice like most girls. im not fat, not one bit.. but im really tanky. so i have a guys body sorta. its really embarasing and i hate wearing bakinis because i dont like my body. what do guys think about this? is it a turn off? please be honest
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male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (25 July 2011):
 Everybody knows about playboy and its selection of models. What fewer people know is that the magazine turning down one model for not fitting their standards saw the creation of another skin-mag. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfect_10_(magazine)
No, that mag was never as famous as playboy itself but it does show that even in (semi)-porn not all tastes are the same despite many claiming all models are the same. Almost everyone who has to select models, erotic or not, has their own standards because tastes differ.
And yes, boyish is a taste. You might want to google for tomboy... don't want to be called that? How about Gamine? Now depending on how... flat you are that might or might not apply but you should find among the result Audrey Hepburn generally considered to be one of the most beautiful women. And not for her hour glass figure. Even in the era when fuller figures were perfectly acceptable.
But you are not like her? That is not the point, the point I am trying to make is that women with all sorts of figures are considered to be beautiful. Someone out there likes the way you look.
The only practical advice I can give is to work with what you got and don't try to fit yourself into a role your body does not fit. Small tits? Then forget about a cleavage but use the fact that they are unlikely to sag. Small hips, then you don't explode in a pair of tight jeans.
Look for women with a similar figure who you do think are beautiful and see what they do to make their looks work for them.
A
male
reader, Odds  +, writes (25 July 2011):
 My first girlfriend hated her hips, called them her "boy hips," and would let her insecurities about them distract her from her good attributes (legs a mile long...). Know what bothered me most about her body? The insecurities it caused meant that she refused to wear a two-piece to the beach.
Now, on a practical level, some guys will be turned off by your body shape, it's true. Perhaps a lot. But you're not fat, and you can emphasize your good features to great effect. Grow your hair long if you want to look more feminine. Dress to emphasize either your boobs, but, or legs (one at a time is best for attracting a long-term boyfriend, as it strikes the right balance between availability and modesty). The curvy waist-to-hip ratio is nice, but it's not the be-all, end-all of attractiveness. Be patient about finding the right guy, and when you find him, take his word for it when he says he likes it.
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A
male
reader, NerdyGuy  +, writes (25 July 2011):
Hey, my first girlfriend was quite *tanky*, even a bit fat. Anyway, the first thing that comes to mind now is that she was the first girl I kissed, and in fact, she was a perfect kisser. I remember her lips, her tongue, the way her spine trembled in my hands. The second thing that comes to mind is the time we had together, how intelligent and careful she was. I remember her blue guitar, the songs she liked, the cookies she made.
And the last thing that comes to mind is that she was tanky. I never considered her body as beautiful, I just loved her.
My point is, body shape is not the thing that makes you who you are. You have plenty of other traits for you future bf to like/love you for.
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A
female
reader, ayeshaH  +, writes (25 July 2011):
i agree everyone has insecurities about their body.
at your age i pretty much hated my body. im short and i have very non curvy hips and legs. i spent so much hating myself.
now i am 21 and i feel silly for being so insecure and judging myslef so much. iv learnt to love what iv been given and also realised that there is nothing wrong with me. there is so much variety when it comes to body shapes and theres no one correct body shape.
please don't be embarassed about your body. im sure its lovely.
trust me just about every girl (and guy) growing up has issues with their body.
but you will realise that theres nothing wrong with it. so try to start loving who you are now and be confident about it!
xx.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2011): Everyone has things about their body that they hate. No one person has the perfect body no matter what any magazine or the media says. It is our imperfections that make us beautiful. Please look at yourself differently because I'm sure you're gorgeous. Never let anyone bring you down including yourself.
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