A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:What do guys look in girls? ive never had a boyfriend as im not very pretty. Also how do you know if a guy does fancy you?
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male
reader, daletom  +, writes (16 January 2008):
Yes, initially there needs to be at least a little bit of physical attraction. But having said that - "Attractive" REALLY IS in the eye of the beholder!
Take a look at the couples around you. Not necessarily the folks you see at school, but older people who have been together for many years. Maybe even couples who are (ugh!) your parents' age. If you are honest, you will see that all kinds of people find partners: short people and tall people, fat people and skinny people; curly haired people and bald people; even smart people and dumb people. Ask yourself, "What did he/she ever see in her/him?". Then be VERY brave and ask that question of the couple themselves. But don't put it exactly that way. Instead, ask "How did you meet and what brought you together?". Believe it or not - old married people LOVE to answer that question! Listen to the answers you hear, and notice how much the physical appearance played a part.
I haven't seen you but there are almost certainly guys who find you more attractive than you think you are. Don't believe everything the advertising and entertainment industry tells you about "attractive". I prefer tall women with little or no makeup, simple clothes, maybe glasses to accent her eyes - other guys like the short ones with carefully applied makeup and flashy clothes. You don't have to be attractive to ALL guys - just ONE guy. (Well, OK, having 2 or 3 guys interested at the same time might be fun and definitely an ego boost!)
There are plenty of books and web sites to suggest ways to dress, hold yourself (posture), arrange your hair, etc to make the most of your natural attractiveness. A smile - on your face, and in your voice - definitely helps!
Now your appearance might please my eyes and hold my attention for a few hours, but what REALLY attracts me to a woman is intelligence. This really came home to me many years ago when I worked at an applied research "think tank" company. Mostly I did organizing and proof-reading of technical reports composed by others. Every place I looked there were brainy gals! A short, chunky girl with braces on her teeth - and a PhD in Nuclear Physics. The somewhat frumpy, flat-chested woman, about 15 years older than me, with kids in High School - and an expert on Cryptography. The M.D. infectious disease specialist with the short cropped hair who hobbled with a limp. I was very married, but I realized that if I was ever to stray and have an affair, it would be with somebody like these women! Not all men are like that, but if you want to catch my attention let your intelligence show.
A
female
reader, O Connor  +, writes (16 January 2008):
 hey, look hun you dont need to be the prettiest girl in the world to be attractive to guys. be confident, friendly and walk with your head held high!!guys love a girl who is confident in herself and is fun! guys that fancy you show it in different ways, some flirt with you upfront, some are shy around you, some are playful with you etc, and some just love being around you, do you think that someone in particular fancy you? if you wanna email me ill be happy to give you more advice, meanwhile, just be yourself and enjoy it!!xxx
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A
female
reader, Landie  +, writes (16 January 2008):
 From a girls point of view I think every guy looks at different things. Some go for looks, others personality.
As for how you can tell if a guy likes you it can be that he looks at you a lot and if you look at him he suddenly looks away. Other times it can be that he mummbles when talking to you.
I'm sure you are pretty in your own way. And i'm sure that there has been at least one guy that has liked you before.
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