A
female
age
41-50,
*issingHimAlready
writes:What changed in our relationship that is making him go?This is the last thing I thought I would ever be doing at 2:30am on Valentine's Day. Last night my boyfriend of 2 years asked me to sit down and talk with him and continued to express to me that he feels he needs to leave/move out. Things have seemed off between the two of us for the past week. He has been very distant with me lately and physical contact has been almost completely void. Normally in bed he would hold me or snuggle and that has stopped recently. Kissing has stopped. Also, his response to me telling him I love you started to slow. This man is the best thing that has ever happened to me and I am so scared to watch him leave. He has always been wonderful to me. I am 32 and he is 46. He has been divorced for about 10 years, he has several children that are grown. I asked him if he was seeing someone else or if there is someone that he has been speaking to that he is growing fond of and he insists no there is no one else. He did express to me that 7 years ago there was a woman that he had strong feelings for. He didn't go into great detail but all he said was he wants to find those same feelings in a relationship and I guess he doesn't feel that same connection with us. I asked him if he was final with his decision or if this is something we could try and work through and with some hesitation he shook his head and said no. I expressed to him that I love him and he told me that he cares for me and didn't want to hurt me. In recent months he has been talking about buying property be it land or a home somewhere. He expressed that he wants to have something to leave to his children later in life when he is gone. Also, we have talked about how I have no children and if I want one. I don't know if I do or not. In the past this has been a difficult topic for him because he is unable to give me a child plus he has already raised several children. He has said that he doesn't want to hold me back almost like him saying that unless he leaves he knows he might be the reason to hold me back. I expressed many many times that I'm ok with not having children. I don't want to lose this man and I don't know the right steps to keep him. If anyone has words of wisdom to offer I would be grateful for your guidance.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2010): This is one of those things when you realise after the hurt is gone that it was probably for the best...
What kind of man would leave his lover on valentine's eve anyway....
He sounds like he needs a retirement buddy.. and you sound like you need a life.
So gather yourself together and don't lose your respect over this man.
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