A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:this is gonna sound really stupid, but i've gotta go for a scan of my baby that i've recently decided to have terminated due to a change of circumstances with the baby's father. it is the eight week scan and i've been looking on the internet at pictures so i kind of know what to expect, but i've got a feeling it's going to be heartbreaking.. i was just wondering if there's anyway i could prepare myself or not let it upset me as much. i am actually dreading it. :(
View related questions:
abortion, the internet Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI was told that is the earliest they can see me.. But it's not long now. Am I be being paranoid or am I likely to have a bump at about 9/10 weeks? x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2008): No hunny you don't wait another week you get back to you GP tell him what happened and ask him to get on the phone ASAP or you do it yourself. Explain that you attended only to be directed to the wrong department and you want an appointment before next week as this is causing you sevre distress. Give us an update after you have tried this.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI went yesterday to the hospital only to have been sent to the wrong bit so I didn't have a scan at all and now have to wait over a week for another one! I am so livid!!! =[ x
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2008): Recently I had an abortion honey, and during the scan, they often turn the screen away. If they don't, then just don't look. I promise you, it's hard as hell. It's a horrible thing, but some people suffer more than others. Honestly, it will be over relatively quickly. It's not nice for the time that it endures, but I promise you, it is not as bad as a lot of people make out. I say this from experience. Just relax and don't expect the worse. Many many girls have abortions/scans and it is not the end of the world.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2008): if you are not going through with the pregnancy don't go for the scan.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2008): Are you one hundred percent sure this is what you want for sure??? make sure it is because you are right it will break your heart for many many years! Can i ask why you are going to have the scan if you are not going to go through with the pregnancy? If you are sure that this is what you want to do, you would be better not going for the scan as trust me when you see that heartbeat and what would grow into your child it will not be so easy to do! i know! nothing you can do will prepare you for this! If its because father does not want the child and you do even a little you can bring it up on your own there is so much support out there for young single mothers! i had my son when i was 17 his father and i are not togeather! I really really hope you all the best for your future good luck!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (24 April 2008):
 Someday when you grow older and wiser and reflect back on what
you said today,you will learn what a tragedy .
A tragic decision which will haunt you forever.
Like those Lemmings which all rushed over the cliff and drowned.
...............................
A
female
reader, bfly36  +, writes (24 April 2008):
 i would not like to be in this situation, i helped a girl once that was gonna have an abortion a 4 months of pregancy, he became my Godson and she loves her son, he changed her life and made her a better person, yes its hard but it can also change ur life for the better. I have met alot of women that have had abortions and regret it and have had to go to counseling for it. I would really think about it, are u willing to face the pain afterwards and the possible medical problems that can occur after words, i hope u make the choice u can live with and good luck.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you very much for all your kind advice. To the writer below me, I have not told my mum - I do not want to break her heart.. But I am seriously considering it now..
I believe it is cruel to bring a baby into this world only to pass it on to someone else. There are plenty of babies and children without homes, without me contributing to this number. I am not simply going to give birth to something I do not intend to cherish and love, just to make the guilt on myself any less...
But thank you very much. x
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2008): Dear Poster
I really feel for you, but this answers comes from a mother who accompanied her 17yrs old daughter to the clinic (duaghter choice) as she wanted a termination. This was only last week so it is very raw! She had to have a scan, so they could tell how many weeks pregnant she was, as this determines what method of abortion is available. Now in my daughters case she was 6 weeks, they gave her an option a medical abortion (pills) or a sugical abortion (general put to sleep although some have said they can change and ask if you want a local!) She opted for the medical, she went to hospital they gave her 1 tablet and told her to come back 3 days later, where is would recieve the other tablets and have to stay in ward all day & maybe overnight. Now don't get me wrong I am NOT making out this is something easily done it BLOODY HARD and I will prob get alot of other aunts/uncles on here critizising ME, but I went through this with my OWN DAUGHTER, I supprted her stood by her every step of the way did not judge same as I do for any perticullary young girls who find themselves in the same situation. Of course my daughter was afaid to tell me she thought I would go ape, but I would have been more hurt if she had had to go through it alone, so please have someone with you that will support you. My daughter is coping, this is what she wanted, I am not saying whe was unaffected but, I as her mother and the rest of my family have tried to make this as bearable and guiltless as possible. I hope I have helped you dear, and some of the others who are going through the same. I wish to remain anon not through fear of critisisim but privecy Take care
...............................
A
female
reader, laylajane +, writes (23 April 2008):
Hi. I felt the same a couple of months ago. would do i do and how will i cope! theres so many things that will go through your mind its normall. all i can say is its up to you what you decided to do no one can make this big desicion for you, thats the mistake i made, but even though i went through with it i new that i did the right thing because it felt right plus the way my life was at the time i would of been selfish to bring somthing into this world that i couldnt support. you will be fine love no need to worry you just need to be strong minded and take some time out, go for a walk even and decided what you want to do dont listen to anybody else. and once you have mad your mind up everything will be okay. you will feel upset for the first couple of days but that is expected but as soon as you put ur self together again and get on with things with your head up high it will all go away and you'll be fine. take care. and remember only you can make this desicion.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2008): From personal experience.... DON'T DO IT. Put it up for adoption. The burden you will carry for the rest of your life is nothing compared to the anxiety you feel pertaining the scan.
...............................
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (23 April 2008):
 If the staff knows that you have decided to have an abortion, then they will most likely turn the screen so you cannot see it. If they don't turn the screen don't look and save yourself the heartbreak.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2008): If you end up aborting your baby, the best thing you can do is get used to the idea of having breast cancer. Abortion is the single greatest predictor of getting breast cancer later in life. My advice is to carry the baby to term, and then give him or her up for adoption. There are many caring, loving couples out there, unable to produce a child, who would love to adopt a healthy baby.
...............................
A
male
reader, Andrew83 +, writes (23 April 2008):
 To what i know you will feel different after seeing your unborn baby.
What you feel now may not be what you feel then.
You may change your mind after the scan.
You may be on pills as far as i know (a big maybe here).
It may hurt alot too.
Have you really spent time thinkin about this all the way to the end?
Sorry about not much advice here from me. I hope for the best for you in what you have decided to do.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni meant how to prepare myself for the scan, not the abortion itself...
...............................
|
