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What can I do to be less shy around boys?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 August 2023) 3 Answers - (Newest, 25 August 2023)
A female age 18-21, anonymous writes:

I am 17 years old (soon to be 18), and have never, ever been close to being in a relationship. Not once. I really cannot figure out why, I am a bit nervous around guys but not in a way thats weird or anything, I'm just a bit shy.

It's not because I am ugly either, I wouldn't say I'm drop dead gorgeous, but I'm decently attractive, I'm even signed to a modelling agency. I've never even held hands with a boy in a romantic way, never kissed, never hugged, and I feel like im falling behind, everyone else seems to have had at least one relationship. What can I do to be less shy around boys, and actually talk to them?

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom +, writes (25 August 2023):

kenny agony auntI think the best thing is to be your authentic self and just go with the flow and let things transpire easily and naturally.

I think sometimes people think to much and try to hard and end up being something they are not, then when they eventually get that person they have then got to keep up that pretence.

Don't ever change who you are, the best relationship that will happen to you will be the one that happens when you very least expect it, and things will just flow naturally without you even having to think about it.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (22 August 2023):

Honeypie agony auntPractice.

Just start by saying hi and doing some small talk.

You don't have to ONLY talk to guys you are romantically interested in. If you go grab a coffee, talk to people. It doesn't have to be a deep conversation.

Weather, sports, music, and movies are "easy subjects".

The more you push your own boundaries the sooner you will realize it's not that hard.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 August 2023):

As a shy guy, I will give you advice as a shy girl. Even the cockiest most confident guy will enjoy a girl flirting with him or pumping up his ego. From there with that encouragement, a lot of guys will start to initiate and pursue you. It could be a simple as a deliberate smile when you know he is looking or even a wink. Women are supposedly vain but so are guys. Any kind of compliment - his car, his shirt, his haircut, how he smells (nice preferably), his eyes, his smile, his laugh, his humor, or (if applicable) some part of his body (his biceps, his abs, his butt). If the guy figures he has a chance with you, he will be bolder and initiate. The times I had confidence to approach a girl, she gave me a little random encouragement first. It was magic. I felt like a superhero and took a chance.

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