A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes: My b/f and I broke up over trust issues... he had a std and had not told me, I found out 6 mnths ago but continued the relationship as I loved him, found he was emailing ex's as friends he said .. now I have trust issues as the truth about the std did not come out till 2 years into the relationship. He has let me go due to my trust issues, I hurt so badly, what to do.
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (10 August 2011):
Okay, I wouldn't call what you have "trust issues". That implies that you're the one with the problem, and his breaking up with you is him sending the message that you have the problem.
Believe me, you don't have a problem. If I was with a guy who knew he had an STD (especially an incurable one like HIV or herpes) for 2 years while I was dating him (and getting physical!), I wouldn't trust anything about him. That is highly cruel and in some states legally actionable if he knowingly exposed you to it.
You have every right not to trust him. You do NOT have issues. He does...for starters, exposing the one he says he loves to an STD. That is just sick and wrong. I would actually be more angry about something like that than I would if a guy had cheated. One may be a betrayal, but the other would put my life in possible danger.
I would suggest getting tested yourself. You owe it to yourself and your future partners to get cleared by a doctor. If you come out negative, then you dodged a bullet. I know you're hurting, and I don't blame you. But concentrate on your healing and let this guy fade into the pond scum he really is.
If you come out positive, seriously, I'd talk to a lawyer. This guy should NOT do that to anyone else.
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