A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I want to know what a man looks for in a female. What are the qualities that attract and keep men. I have the physical side down, thanks to genetics and healthy eating. Although, I am disadvantaged due to the fact that I am not caucasian and have blonde hair. ( I am darker with brown hair and Asian ancestry). But I want to know about personality. Do men like it when their women acts submissive, or a bit more feisty. Perhaps humour is a turn on or being aloof? I ask because my partner treated his ex like a princess and treats me like a best mate. He says its because I am not a high maintenance, make up wearing blonde more of a girl next door that he can kick back and relax with. I want to be treated like I'm special and not a buddy so I need some tips on how to go about doing that with out having blonde hair and pretty blue eyes.
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male
reader, Odds +, writes (17 August 2010):
 Regarding your current man, he probably does not treat you like a princess because he believes that's why his last girlfriend broke up with him. Once a guy has been burned a few times for being the nice guy, he stop treating women like princesses.
Consider yourself fortunate he treats you like his best friend and not like an object - it means that he still has a positive attitude, and it's better for your long-term prospects.
More generally, the number one quality men seek is loyalty. This is not just sexual fidelity - although obviously, don't cheat on him - it's emotional loyalty.
A guy needs to know that he can be weak in front of you, that he can let his guard down and even cry for a moment, and you'll still respect him and see him as the strong man he tries to be the rest of the time. He wants to know you will still love him and be attracted to him when he's on hard times, and that you won't listen when your girlfriends trash-talk him. He wants to know you won't run out the first time you get bored, or flake on your promises and dates.
Respect is a very close second. Your man needs to know that you trust him to make decisions, and that you won't mock him or undercut him. He also needs to know that you trust yourself, and are confident enough to let problems go rather than whine about them (better yet, just solve them).
This should be like the relationship between pilot and copilot - you are competent, and your input is valued, but once decisions are made, both of you will work together on the chosen path without griping over whose idea you *should have* used.
Femininity is right up there, too. The difference is, this quality is not necessary to attract and keep a man. Femininity is what makes him treat you like a princess.
Femininity means: don't yell, curse, get sloppy drunk, hit anyone, belch, or gossip about him to your girlfriends. Do be sensual in private, modest in public, and nurturing always. Do respect expressions of his masculinity without derision.
There's more, but those things form the core of it. Honestly, they are hard enough by themselves. Done correctly, they will inspire most men to be the best they can be, and to treat you with all the love, loyalty, and respect that you deserve. And the first two don't even require you to change your personality, just to amplify your good traits.
Best of luck!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2010): You have to be who you are, true to yourself, you may be able to get a man to treat you a certain way by acting another way, but you can't keep up that act forever.
The woman your boyfriend treated like a princess is his ex, what does that tell you?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2010): I like a girl with some brains and has a real indentity & personality.
I like cute blonds but a cute brunette turns my head just as fast. I really don't prefer one over the other.
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A
female
reader, hmm92  +, writes (16 August 2010):
sorry but he sounds like a dick, id chuck him! all women shoiuld be made to feel beautiful by the person they love
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2010): Being white and blonde does nothing for me although i myself am white and blonde,give me a girl with a healthy looking shiny brown/black hair and a skin colour to match and bingo what a princess,like who you are as many of us guys out here love girls like you.
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A
male
reader, LittleAlfie +, writes (15 August 2010):
 Well, qualities vary from man to man. It's ultimately up to you to decide what sort of woman you are. It seems small minded, but everyone in relationships play up to gender roles. Some women prefer a man to be dominant, some prefer the opposite. And a rare few truly believe in an even relationship. If you're being treated like a close friends and it bothers you so much, perhaps communicating that to him in a way he'll understand is your best answer. You can be a casual, cool, low maintenance woman and still be queen of his world. It's personally the type of girl the guys I know have always been attracted to. Decide your worth, take it upon yourself to be special to YOU, and that should reflect in the way he treats you.
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