A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:What are all the options for a girl with a man whose penis is almost 5 inches? I secretly cry in my pillow after sex because my body is so sexually pent up. I am 33 but I do kegol exercises everyday and I've had no children and my ex boyfriends were not much bigger. I'm so depressed because I love this person and never want to have to leave him but I've learned that a penis that doesn't satisfy causes an incredible trickle down effect of frustration in a woman's life that I would have never imagined. I've stayed with him 3 years because once in a blue moon it works out just well enough. I need satisfying sex like air, food and water. Am I just not doing effective enough kegols or is 5 inches really just too small for a girl whose 5' 8"? (Which isn't really that tall) I really believe there has to be a solution for me? Does something happen to a woman's tightness after 30 that's difficult to remedy? God Please help me! It breaks my heart to be so sexually frustrated with someone I love. Any suggestions?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2008): Size doesn't matter, it really is all about the technique... Several things stand out for me....
1) For you sex is about quantity. You want a big penis, you want it wider... "I have every toy and know every position"
2) You and him have rushed sex....
3) Foreplay is only a suggestion, rather than the main part of sex, which is what it should be...
Why don't you change tack and take things right back to basics. Firstly slow the sex right down, work on the quality rather than the quantity. Take more time to enjoy foreplay before sex, then get into the dog position and get him to enter you from the rear. But don't move, you don't move and don't let him move at all. (This is best done with blindfolds) Enjoy the sensation of him being inside you, and see how long you both can stay like this before one of you has to move. You can use your vaginal muscles if you want to, but don't move at all, just enjoy the sensations of penetration. Then when you both get excited, you can start moving, and get him to stimulate your clitoris and your breasts with his hand.
Hopefully this should do the trick and fool your brain into getting excited from the smallest movements, and this will make him feel a lot bigger to you. I think your sex needs to take more time to raise the temperature higher, and this should be enough to drive you wild.
Give patience and slowness a try....
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank You for all your honest opinions. I have tried everything you have all suggested. I am a very selfless person in bed, I have every toy and know every position and am extremely patient and always suggest foreplay. I think you are right, 5 inches isn't bad. I think it really is girth. I do have a girth ring that I haven't tried because I don't want to hurt his feelings. I don't think he will mind though because he knows I love him. He does need to be less anxious and selfish I suppose. We barely have any time together because we are on opposite schedules so our sex is rushed a lot. There was a lot I didn't explain in my question but thank you all for your advice though.
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A
male
reader, Arianz  +, writes (7 December 2008):
 I feel sorry about you. But fron another part I am bit upset about ur complain. Coz u said u love him.If you love him then i think size cant be a big deal for you.
from my point view u can make the fore play more longer n also positions so that u can have ur want...
take care....hope u will recover form this problem soon
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A
female
reader, ChristineD. +, writes (7 December 2008):
 I don't know about other girls, but to me, I think it helps if you really are in love. I also really think it's how he uses it. My boyfriends is around 6" and im 6 foot, 1 inch, and it's great for me! I definitly don't think it has to do with your'e height. When you guys are in the moment, and if there is something he does that really gets you, something you really like, let him know you liked it, say something like, "I love when you do that to me." Or, "Don't stop." Or when you guys are getting in the mood, guide him a little. Tell him about what he did last time that you liked so much, or tell him what you want, in a sesy-like voice so he doesn't take it the wrong way. Or maybe foreplay for a while before you do the deed, maybe for ten or fifteen minutes, it will surely get you in the mood more. Experiment! Hope I helped a little.Good luck and have fun!
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (3 December 2008):
 It depends. Where does you satisfaction come from during intercourse? Women all need/want different things. Deepness of penetration? Width? Or clitoral stimulation?
If you need a big one, then you are out of luck. Maybe you can introduce a sex toy?
For clitoral stimulation, different positions can make the most of what you got. See what works, try positions, moving your legs around until he does hit the right spots. Maybe a penis ring will help, go shopping.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (3 December 2008):
 Input from "NiceKid" seems right-on in my opinion. Personal experience with a couple extra inches does not seem to have really had all that much advantage over the years, because deeper penetration does not directly stimulate the clitoris. No complaints, but in my opinion, "grinding" the clitoris against the man's pubic area (there is a boney arch above the penis) best triggers feelings that may lead to female orgasm during intercourse. Still, I think that success in satisfying a woman is best achieved via abundant foreplay and a good session of cunnilingus prior to vaginal intercourse. One or multiple orgasms may be achieved with properly applied cunnilingus (oral stimulation of the vulva and clitoris), after which intercourse may produce one or more additional female orgasms. And as "Teacake" recommends, woman-on-top typically facilitates deeper penetration with practice. You can also effectively "grind" in this position. Penile penetration alone for several minutes, contrary to the opinion of most men, is simply not all that satisfying to women. It is anti-climatic.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (3 December 2008):
 From your post, it is easy to see that you don't have fulfilling sex, and, more importantly, that you think it would be fulfilling if his penis were larger. I'm afraid that is not necessarily true.
If, deep inside, you are convinced that his size is all that matters, then no improvements on technique will give you what you want. No Kegel exercises will do that, either, because your exercising your muscles does not enlarge his penis. Nothing you do will.
People will say that I have a vested interest or a bias in saying this, since I am a man, so I will only say that many women say that technique is the single most important factor in their having satisfactory sex. Women have their preferences but they still want the man to know his way.
It is also clear that you expect all the pleasure to come from what he does. That is so wrong... You need to do your part, too, for your own pleasure, and for his pleasure, too. Sorry, there's no such thing as "I will just lay down here and you will please me". Maybe he's a bad lover, but I find it too easy to just blame him for everything.
Maybe you need to do a little thinking and go beyond the size of his penis.
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A
male
reader, werenotincontrol  +, writes (3 December 2008):
Have ye guys tried from behind? Maybe lieing down and moving your legsto the side and keep closed.
Look up small penis positions on the net. There are positions with you can get greater penetration.
If all else fails buy a vide and ride the maybe when your in house by yourself?
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A
female
reader, Teacake +, writes (3 December 2008):
 Do you ever get on top? Sometimes that position helps stimulate the right spot regardless of their size and depending on how you ride him. Sorry to be so graphic.
If you aren't too embarrassed to masturbate together, that can be exciting.
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A
female
reader, katatonik +, writes (3 December 2008):
 Try getting him to satisfy you in other ways. Is he expecting you to come through sex only? See if he is willing to make you orgasm through manual or oral stimulation of your clitoris. If he doesn't know much about this you will at least have a pleasurable time teaching him what you like ;)
Good luck!
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