A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Good evening (or morning) agony aunts/uncles. So, I want to cut to the chase. I have am a single gay man. And in my town on the opposite end--there's a gay man that works in a coffee shop who also happens to be single. Problem is we don't know each other. We both seem to have mutual friends on facebook (unfortunately I am not too close to any of the 7 friends we have in common to introduce each other.) Anyhow, I feel creepy looking him up and knowing him without him knowing me at all. Stalker status, feel free to judge me -__- Trust me, I feel so bad about it. At this point though--I am too damn intrigued.Anyhow, since his information is public to friends of friends--I am not going to lie, I have "creeped on his facebook." Now on his facebook, he has posted somethings that lead me to believe he might be worthy of getting to know. Sort of a silly assumption, but I can deduce he's had bad experiences dating and he can't find someone that will take him serious. I'd like for that shot to get to know him. However, at this point I feel too weird knowing about him without him knowing at all about me...how can I play this off like nothing? Also, I am quite awkward in general. Is it worth it trying to talk to him and getting to know him? And if so what's a good way to break the ice...especially if he happens to be working? (FYI--I haven't crossed the line of memorizing his work schedule...and I am not planning on doing so...again I feel like a total creep.)I guess I ended up writing a long-winded question, and I apologize. Basically should I stop here or should I pursue getting to know him? Ideas on how to break the ice and...willing to take advice of any kind from anyone. For those who think it's okay to pursue getting to know him...in general what are some good ways to break the ice with a stranger?Thanks again, and I look forward to all your answers. I will rate them all, I promise =]
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male
reader, jc2008  +, writes (31 May 2012):
Hey,
Well this guy works in a Coffee Shop, perfect oppotunity there then, hes in a customer facing job. A friend of mine once had the same problem and this is how you solve it. Visit the coffee shop with a friend (or two) when you know he is working there. Make some polite friendly conversation, possibly about the weather, sports or somthing thats relevant. Leave the shop with your friend but come back 20 minutes later, go up to speak with him and tell him that your friend has lost somthing in the shop and give him your mobile number to call you if they find it. Obviously drop a huge hint that you might be interested in him and see what happens!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2012): Hmmm, but since he doens't know you, you should be able to try and start up a conversation. A little honesty, just saying that he got you interested, might help. It would be a waste not trying to get to know him better, so gather some courage and go for it!
Breaking the ice itself... I think is usually done by accident or just with a random, generic conversation. You could even just ask what coffee he'd recommend or something, and build a conversation based on his answer~
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