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What are his reasons behind joining this website?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Breaking up, Dating, Sex, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 September 2008) 2 Answers - (Newest, 10 September 2008)
A female United Kingdom age 51-59, anonymous writes:

i had a child with a man who i not only loved but who i thought wanted to be with me and our daughter as a family. I have found out that after we split up he went on an adult websight and has ticked boxes in which he has said he is looking for couples(man and woman) to have sex with and group sex and he has also declined to say his sexual orientation. he left me when our daughter was a baby and i was devastated i feel that this answers why he left and i feel that i never knew him at all. but the question really is could he have joined this sight as a joke after a few beers. he also declined to answer on whether he drinks or smokes (which he does) or does thie fact that he never said that he was straight pretty much indicate that he is bisexual?? please give me some good honest advice xx

View related questions: smokes, split up

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

He joined about two and a half years after we split up but when i was with him he never indicated he was into this sort of stuff and i never doubted his sexuality. he is with a woman now and my daughter says that it all seems normal (not that i have asked but she has been to stay with him)! thanks for your reply!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2008):

I'm sure this was a big shock to you. How soon after you split up did he join the website?

It really doesn't matter whether he joined as some sort of sick joke - for what its worth, though, it probably was not a joke.

The main thing now is whether he is paying child support. If he is not, he should be. You need to go to court, or child services to get a court-order. He, as well as you, is responsible for bringing a baby into the world, and that means he has obligations.

I'm sorry you are (understandably) upset, but really, he sounds like a man not worth having around. Pretty sleazy.

Grieve, if you need to - but not too long! And then forget about him (EXCEPT for INSISTING on getting child support) and get on with your life........

Good luck

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