A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Here it goes:In an attempt to get over my ex I made an account on a dating site. I met a guy and he wanted to text so he sent me his #. I was skeptical at first but feeling really outgoing and adventerous so I decided I'd text him. After seeing my pictures (pg of course) he wanted to meet up and take me back to his place. He specifically said that he'd like to try a friends with benefits type of thing. I agreed seeing as I'm not ready for a relationship. He said that was perfect because he was focusing on his career and didn't have time for anything other than just a friend. I (stupidly) agreed to meet him and so the next day he picked me up and on the way to his place we talked. He told me a lot about himself, he's new to the area and doesn't know anyone. He told me about college and all about his job and where he was from. When we got to his place we had sex, afterwards he tried to old my hand but I was too freaked out to even talk. I've never in my life done anything like that at all. The only men I've ever had sex with were men that i'd already had established friendships with.I asked him to take me home a little later and that night he asked me how often I planned on seeing him. He'd asked me If I'd had a crush on him. I told him that I thought he was really cute, very smart and the type of guy I'd usually go for. He then asked me If I thought we'd date. when I told him I didn't think it would work out because of his job and my fresh breakup he got weird.He expressed to me that he'd like to take things further. This puzzled me because it seems like he had changed his mind so quick. Just 24 hours earlier he was adamant about not having a relationship and us being JUST friends.A few days later I agreed to spend the night at his place so that we could talk about things. We stayed up all night long talking. He said that he felt like we were friends, that we just "clicked". I feel the same way but I'm the type of person who doesn't trust things like that although I'm all about giving people chances. Now I'm confused!
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crush, friend with benefits, my ex, text Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI never really got to finish the rest of the story hah. I'll post another when I get a chance with the whoooole deal. so look out for it!
thanks :)
A
female
reader, Auntie E +, writes (13 March 2010):
 Auntie E's #1 rule - never agree to being "friends with benefits." This is a sure fire way for a girl to get used and feel used. That being said I think this guy was just making sure you clicked (as he said) before saying he wanted to be in a relationship. Now that you have met and had sex maybe now that's what he wants - a relationship. Is this what you want?
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