A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've recently hit two years since the end of my last relationship (which lasted a solid week), and since then I've not come close to having a relationship or even a casual lay with any girl. I've also recently seen my best friend get married -- a deadline I'd set myself for finding someone even for just an easy-going casual relationship. And to be honest I'm sick of being single.Honestly, all you taken people, what am I not getting here? I'm a nice guy, I'm funny and I'm good looking. My confidence has gone up in huge amounts lately, and I make a huge effort. But somehow guys who lack all of these qualities are still more successful than I. Please don't just tell me I'm young and that "it will happen", because I'm not after the girl I'll marry one day. By 23, I should be able to at least pass close to seeing success once a year.So what am I not getting?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2008): Not an easy question but you definitely deserve an answer. It's frustrating. It's very frustrating. You're a salesmen and you've got a superior product but somehow the guy across the street is selling more vacuums. You're a stellar employee and somehow your boss promotes your undeserving and unqualified colleague instead of you. You're nice, funny and good looking twenty-three year old and somehow guys around you are landing more dates. Why? It just doesn't make sense for life to work that way.
Your personal situation is unique and so words of advice don't come easy without knowing you efforts and experiences but I would like to offer some food for thought. It really depends on your personality.
If you're business-oriented, you could objectify yourself as a marketable product and revamp your strategy depending on your training in that particular field.
If you're science-oriented you could read up on interpersonal psychology and the science of attraction. The more we know, the more we see, the more easily we can diagnose, the more effectively we can rectify our behaviour.
If you're system-orientated, try http://www.fastseduction.com/guide/ Some guys really vouch for it.
If you're discouraged, keep your chin up. At 23, the hormones are really roaring on both sides.
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