A
female
age
30-35,
*ulliepeter
writes: i need help..my boyfriend and i have been dating for three weeks now and i seriously dont know what our problem is everytime we get together its ussually just arkward even our phone calls are ussually just short and end up with silent pauses and at the end we just say bye...i dont know whats wrong and after sex its worse we dont even talk and it makes me feel embarrased and that arkward position it puts us...somebody tell me what i can do...i ussually wanna talk but i just end up lost with words and feel shy and end up quet and he talks but ussuall yhings nothing about us...i seriously dont know whats wrong is it us is there anything i can do...i always feel like writting good things to him special things like i love him o also things that are happening in my life that ad wanna talk to him about but am just scared maybe he might ignore me o something i dont know am stressed about this what do i do.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2013): You really are jumping into this way too quickly... When you've JUST met someone (as in known for 3 weeks) they are pretty much a stranger! I always advise with ANY dating/ re/ship to always take things slowly... Then you can see if he's still around in a couple of months if you haven't slept together yet... You'll be much more informed about what his true intentions are and the kind of guy he is.Sorry but where's the trust and connection here after three weeks? All There is between you both is sex really- I'm sorry but you barely know each other... I think you should write this one off, as this isn't really gelling as a relationship... Take care xxx
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (12 September 2013):
Wow... slow down
3 weeks you should still be getting to know him
3 weeks of dating should be MAXIMUM of 6 dates
sex should not even be on the table yet.
IF you can't find things to talk about then maybe you don't have a lot in common... sex can make you think that it's a real relationship and you have stuff in common when you don't.
Tell him you need to stop having sex for now (I hope he wears condoms) and then see how it goes... if you think you can't have a relationship without sex, well then it's not a real relationship it's just sex.... and that's never going to last.
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A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy +, writes (12 September 2013):
OP, I think that 3 weeks is too soon for you to call him your boyfriend. At 3 weeks you are just dating, really. And I think you've rushed into a sexual relationship too soon, which can make it harder to walk away.
It doesn't sound like the two of you are suited. Not everyone we date ends up being "the one", of course. Perhaps you should simply split up with him?
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A
male
reader, kingkess +, writes (12 September 2013):
I think you should ask him what he really wants from the relationship
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2013): You have moved too fast - you are having sex already and you're still strangers.
It's not just about being together, you need to
COMMUNICATE - that will take away the awkwardness because you will know what the other person thinks and feels.
So slow down, start TALKING, ask each other questions, get to know each other, before you continue the physical intimacy.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2013): You shouldn't be feeling awkward, you should be enjoying each others company.
What would he avoid talking about the two of you, and where its going etc, if he was really into you?
How can you love him only after 3 weeks, its not long enough to know each other well enough.
I'm sorry but from what you have said, and the lack of communication between the two of you, I just get the impression he is using you for sex.
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