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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Dear Cupid, I need advice please! I am in love with this guy… and have been since I met him almost 7 months ago. After a couple of months, I told him I like him and after a while asked him how he felt. He said he only liked me as a mate. So, I was a little upset, not long after he went out with my mate, but he didn’t want to (he was pressured into it,) Anyway, me and him have become really close, and we tell each other everything, so, he’s told me that he never wanted to go out with my mate, and he’s told me the reasons why and loads of other things… he talks to me about this girl he really really likes and she likes him, (but she’s got a boyfriend) he tells me everything he, even really personal stuff. We’re always with each other and spend all our free time together.Now, I really believe I’m in love with him there isn’t a doubt in my mind. And because of this, I want him to be happy, and if that means he doesn’t end up with me then… If you recorded how we are together, you’d probably think we were already seeing each other, In fact, several time people have said things like how long you two been seeing each other, etc. Like recently, I got really drunk at a party and he looked after me, holding glasses of water for me to drink buying me orange juice etc. Generally looking after me, and (the parts I remember anyway) I loved every minute! It really felt like we was seeing each other. And the next day loads of people from the party said, your boyfriend really looked after you last night, and it really hurt having to say he’s not my boyfriend.After he started seeing my mate I started pretending to him that I didn’t like him like that anymore, saying he was like my big brother etc, (mainly to try and convince myself that it was true…) but It’s not true, I never stopped liking him. He and my “mate” (we’re not really friends anymore.) are barely speaking anymore and he says thats one of the reasons he didn’t wanna go out with her, cause now they’ve lost their friendship and that he wouldn’t go out with a mate again, cause he wouldn’t wanna lose another friendship. So, (again, mainly to trick myself into believing it) I said that I was glad we never ended up going out cause I wouldn’t want to lose how close we are, which is true, but…. I’m not sure if it’s enough anymore. I know I’m only young (I’m 16) but please don’t shrug this of as a puppy love crush that will pass, I really love this guy and I don’t know what to do anymore, I don’t wanna lose him as a friend because of how close we are, flirting constantly, able to talk about anything, with the exception of how I feel bout him. Please help!Thanks in advance!xxxx
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2007): Dear Eve,
I really like this guy at my school and i have liked him for a very long time i already asked him out and he said no because he just wants to be friends what should i do?
A
female
reader, AskEve  +, writes (25 February 2007):
 I was so pleased to see you took my advice and smiled when I read how he kept trying to get in touch. Yep.... he missed you all right! ;o)
Well done! I hope everything works out just great for you.
Eve
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionDear Eve, Thank you so much!!I took your advice, this is the first time I've been on the computer since my last post... and you were right!Friday was the last time I saw him, (thats Friday before my last post) and on sunday I missed a phone call off him... then on tuesday I got a txt asking me if I could go online (hadn't been online since I seen them last) but I was staying with family so I couldn't go online, even though I REALLY wanted to, just to talk to him... so I txt him bk saying I couldn't was with family. (BTW, he never said txt out.) When I got home friday I had another txt off him him asking when I was home. So I told him I was home but that I was busy. So he rang me up and we talked on the phone for just under an hour and a half. (which is great cause he doesn't talk on the phone either. lol) and he said that he had missed me being round and missed talking me. He asked me to come out for a bit, just so we could hang out, but I said no. (which was really hard.) told him I was busy. He sounded really disapointed and asked I we could meet up tomorrow (saturday) instead, and I said said yea, If I'm not too busy.So, I met up with him yesterday and spent ALL day together, and we had a great time like. Just before I went home asked me if he had done something wrong cause I seemed to be avoiding him, I told him that I had just been busy. but he knows me too well, lol, and he asked what was wrong cause he knew that weren't true.Anyway, I told him how I felt and he said that he felt the same way! I couldn't believe it! But we're not seeing each other... yet... because of what happened between him and my mate. Now not that we think we will spilt up anytime soon like, but we both agree that we are too close to risk any thing jsut yet so were gonna see how things go... we don't want to lose how close we are. So yea, Thanks Eve! I really didn't think it would work, didn't think he felt that way... and although we're not seeing each other yet... thinks are much better.Thanks Eve!!!!xxxxxxxxxxx
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (18 February 2007):
I think it would be better to stay off the PC for a while. You could block him but if another friend knows you're on and tells him then he'll wonder how he's blocked so be careful there. Spending time with your family is a good idea too! As far as being in his classes, hurry out after classes and during free periods tell you need to be somewhere or you have things to do. Go to the bathroom or spend it in the library, anything but be with him. You CAN do this if you work at it and if it pays off then it's worth it! :o)
Eve
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionDear Eve, thanks for your advice, It'll be harder than u thought to distance myself from him... he's in all but one of my classes and we spend our frees together too. Plus we talk online always too. but I'm going to try. It's half term this week so I've arranged to spend it with family to get away from him for a while, but all I wanna do is phone him up even just to chat...
I guess I've got no choice really though. so I'm gonna try. thanks again Eve.
xxxx
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (16 February 2007):
One way to see how he really feels about you is to have some space from him. It might be that he really does like you as more than a friend but he just doesn't know that yet as you are always together. And of course you have both gotten a lot closer since you told him you liked him all these months ago.
I would distance yourself from him for a bit (even although I know you'll find this hard) tell him you've been busy (make something up), let him MISS you. He might even end up having a talk with YOU and telling you that he likes you as more than a friend. It's certainly worth a try don't you think? ;o)
Eve
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