A
male
age
30-35,
*andalf55555
writes: My girlfriend and I nearly broke up last week, and I've never been so depressed in my entire life. Instead we've decided to go on a break. She said for a few weeks, maybe a month, and I said I was ok with that. But I'm not. It is SO hard. I miss her so much ALL the time, and when I see her, I have to act like we're not a couple - it is driving me mad. We've talked about it all the time - she thinks it will be good for us, I kind of think the same, but I'm more convinced that it will drive us apart and she'll decide to really break up with me. My life would be ruined if she did that. She means EVERYTHING to me. I'm going to go on this break, for her, because I would do anything for her. I don't like it though. I have to work every day, knowing that at the moment we aren't really a proper couple. It makes me so sad. I'm scared that if we carry on pretending like this, she'll become convinced that we have actually broken up and go after someone else.I just don't know what to do. It is always on my mind. I can never think about anything else except for her, and how I may lose her any day. I want to do something to show her how much I love her and that this break really isn't necessary.Also, some other guy has just come on the scene. See, my girlfriend is part of a swimming club and this guy swims there as well, and they've become friends...They swim there together 3 times a week, and last weekend she was planning to spend both days with him. She spent them with me instead but it really annoyed me. I'm not trying to say that she can't have friends that are boys, I'm just saying I don't trust this guy. Because he fancies her, and he's been asking her about them going out and it makes me so angry, and I know that one of these days he is actually going to try it on with her. And I would kill him if he did. But also, she said that if it wasn't for her meeting me, she would go out with him. That.....that REALLY hurt me.I'm just so angry and depressed and I have all these mixed emotions all the time!!! It is driving me mad!!!I hate it!!! I just wish everything was back to normal, that we weren't on this break, and that this guy would leave her alone. I don't know how much more I can take. One of these days I think I really am just going to completely lose it...
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male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (3 July 2007):
Don't lose it, man.
I think I understand how you feel. You see, we all have been there, more than one time. You're young and you'll go through several situations like this one. May our experiences help you on this one.
If you were happy with your girl, would you ask her for space? Here's your answer: no. So, this break IS a breakup. You just have not realized of that, yet. Accept the facts.
I know how hard it is, but DON'T PUSH IT. If she loves you, she will come your way. So, go on with your life as if she did not exist. This is all you can do.
Don't take it against the other boy. Please look at things the way he sees them: here's a girl he fancies, and she's not with anyone. What would you do if you were him?
Be strong and you'll get through this one.
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