A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Long story. I'll try to condense it.We were a summer fling that happened overseas. We both go to college here so we decided to continue the relationship. During that I broke up with him once, only to get back together the next day. I asked him to communicate better with me because we were long distance. He said he would. I broke up with a second time because I knew we would never be able to see each other and probably less and less. It would probably save us the heartache later on. He insisted that we stay friends. I agreed. He came to visit a month later. We hooked up. I told him it was a mistake. He left, telling me how much he would miss me. I asked him what he thought if I told him I wanted to get back together and asked me if I was sure. He told me to think carefully about it. I told him I'd tell him the next day. When he contacted me, I couldn't get the courage up to tell him that I wanted to get back together.A week later my birthday came and went and he called me, but I was cold and distant. A few weeks later I asked to get back together, he said no because of th edistance and maybe if we'd been closer, it coudl have worked out. Once again, he insisted on being friends. For once, he was very distant from me. I contacted him to apologize for my emotional antics after he rejected me. He told me there was nothing to apologize for. After the intial sobbing had subsided and I could see somewhat with a clear head, I started talking to him casually. A month later, I felt like I could be friends with him and not want anything more. Until I saw that a mutual friend of his had left him a flirtation message and (even a surprise to myself)I got extremely jealous. I called him up. He was drunk, but I basically told him that I wanted to get back together and I didn't want him to see anyone else. He seemed to get slightly angry when I told him I wasn't going to where he lives for break, as previously planned. When I asked if he was okay if I saw someone else, which I was planning to and did a few days later, he just made a grunting noise. He was about to say something, but said that he was drunk, but not stupid. He said that we should leave it as it is and talk when we get back to school. During the break, I've talked to him a few times when we happened to both be online. We have been cordial enough. He told me he's returning to the states tomorrow, but neither of us discussed we would meet up.Do you think he still likes me enough to have another go? Or is he just being nice and wants to stay friends? Or does he just want to put me on the backburner until he finds something better? Sorry for the EXTREMELY long story...
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2008): Hi! It's the poster. Thanks for your comments AndreC.I guess deep down, I know he has moved on.When I asked him on the phone if the reason why he didn't want to get back together with me was because of someone new. He told me that he wouldn't be getting involved with anyone anytime soon. Not quite sure what that meant. Do you think there's someone else in mind already? I mean, I've been with other people since then and after that conversation. I'm on the brink between moving on and not. But I donno. After that phone conversation, I thought, "Oh no. That call was a huge mistake." Early the next day I got a text from him wishing me a good break. Also during the break, he has IMed me, something he hadn't been doing, when I'm usually the one to IM him first post break-up. I guess he feels badly that he doesn't want to be anything more than friends? Or maybe he's just bored? I can't tell anymore. But I think you're right. I guess I need to just settle for friends. He's pretty passive-aggressive so it's always hard to tell with him. But I think ultimately if he wanted something more, he would have said something.
A
male
reader, AndreC.  +, writes (5 January 2008):
 hey um i think that when u told him that you just wanted to be friends the second time that you broke up with him he moved on and now he probably has someone else in mind.I dont think that there is goiñg to be another go it seems like hes moved on sry hun if you need someone to talk to you can msg me on here im also in a long distance relationship so i know how your feeling I am in portugal and my girlfriend is in canada we havent seen eachother for a year and 4 months so anywais if you want to talk dnt hesitate take care hun
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