A
female
age
51-59,
*rishanne
writes: I recently moved in with my friend of 8 years and over the years we have had a sexual relationship. The relationship has never been more than sex and every time he meets someone new I'm left feeling jealous and alone. Once his relationship ends we pick up where we left off back to a sexual relationship. My question can we still be friends? Do I need to put my foot down and say no? Was it wrong for me to move in with him? I'm feeling hurt and I'm not looking forward to seeing her in our apartment.
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female
reader, trishanne +, writes (22 June 2007):
trishanne is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice. The only problem is that we signed a one year lease, so I guess I need to turn up the TV and hit the gym.
Thanks,
Trishanne
A
female
reader, Jovial +, writes (21 June 2007):
Hi
i think God loves us so much that he is able to give us authority to make our own choices. you made your choice and he made his. if u feel the arrangement is no longer working for u then move out, and refuse to have sex with him because u definitley feel is no longer enough. he dates whoever he wants and when its over he comes back to u because thats what you are to him nothing less nothing more. remember this is your life not his so the decision you make must be beneficial to you not him.
if u still choose to be his sexual partner you have to be willing to put up with everywoman he dates and beds and wait for ur turn remember that. why dont u find yourself someone who can give u more and stop settling for something that only breaks your heart? mmh just a thought.
Jovial
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A
female
reader, neonpinkngooey +, writes (21 June 2007):
Yes, you need to put your foot down and say no more. For 8 years, it has been a never-ending cycle of pain and pleasure, which is really not healthy! It was not wrong for you to move in with him; I think you can manage having him around without feeling hurt. Find someone else to occupy your time, rather than your friend, who clearly wants to date other people. The only reason it hurts so much is because you need to feel love, instead of wanted. You need someone to devote his time to you, and only you. So, when his relationship ends, instead of "picking up where you left off" why don't you spend that time trying to find someone that treats you the way you should be treated? As for your past sexual relationship with your friend, say goodbye to it, and continue on as only friends. If it was easy for him to find girlfriends without feeling guilty about you, I am positive that you can do the same. Good luck sweetheart
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