A ,
anonymous
writes: Hi there, I've recently met a girl out off a chatroom, and she is so amazing. She emails me telling me how much she loves me and I feel exactly the same, think I'm falling in love with her! I've rang her a couple of times also and we get on so great. She's on my mind all the time and she says it's the same for her. Been chatting about 2 months but feel I want more than just chatting. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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female
reader, Bev Conolly +, writes (11 April 2005):
It's great that you've found someone that you hit it off so well with, so maybe it's time to consider meeting in person. I'm assuming that this is physically possible for you both? She doesn't live overseas or in a distant country? (If so, that adds another dimension of difficulty in getting to know her better, but it can still be addressed at least partway, with a webcam and a broadband connection.) For the purposes of this answer, I will have to assume that she's in a reachable area.My only caution to you will be not too move too quickly, assuming that everything about your meeting will be as perfect as you hope.We've all heard horror stories of online romances going bad, and I'm not going to reiterate anything like that, but do be cautious.People can be anything they want to when they're chatting; that's certainly part of the appeal. You can just show people your "good side", even though all of us have imperfections. Consider if you have given any possible misapprehensions to her in the last two months. For example, that you're taller than you are, or a different age or something. Be sure those misconceptions are out of the way first, then... ask if she'd like to meet you somewhere!Go someplace for a coffee and a chat. Make it a public place and make it informal, so that if things go well you can extend the visit, but if they don't, then it's not too hard to extricate yourselves.Try not to line up an all-day visit with each other, because, you never know, you just may not click with each other in person.If she's as keen as you sound, what have you got to lose?
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