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Weird feeling when I see my boyfriend after dirty talk

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 July 2012) 4 Answers - (Newest, 6 July 2012)
A female United States age 30-35, *hawtyinlove writes:

me and my boyfriend are open about talking bout sex

but when we talks dirty to me and i talk dirty back i feel very weird when i see him the next day. we text back and forth sexy stuff. i think its hot but im so scared to face him the next day. like example is one time i was texting him saying i wanted to give him head and he got really dirty saying he wanted to eat me out and everything but when i saw him the next day i was shy and ive been with him for about 5mouths on the 5th of july. so now im like i have to get over this! does anyone have any advise on how im suppose to deal with this?

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A female reader, Shawtyinlove United States +, writes (6 July 2012):

Shawtyinlove is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Shawtyinlove agony auntThanks everyone.! i talked to my boyfriend and i told him how i felt after we dirty talk and he said he agrees that he does feel a bit weird. so were going to try it over the phone and in person for now on. THANK YOU AGAIN EVERYONE

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A male reader, Nehemie Mb India +, writes (2 July 2012):

Erm, fascinating! Really! May I ask, is there any reason why you feel shy? Yes, society dictates that all sexual matters should be considered as taboo. Maybe that's what's happening here! But is there any particular reason why you would feel uneasy after that activity?

What I can tell you is that first, sex is a normal thing. And dirty talk is a really fun thing and normal thing. So, what I think is going on here is that you're worried of how he sees (considers) you after all the things you say to each other. You're afraid to be judged? I think this is perfectly normal.

As always, communication is key in all relationships. So, tell him how you feel! He's best placed to give you solid arguments as to why you shouldn't feel shy.

Plus, don't overthink things, a dirty talk session is just that, a dirty talk session. This can actually be an opportunity to grow your relationship that presents itself here. Talk to your boyfriend about how you feel. I'm sure he'll find a way to make it easy on you. You're his girl now, and he's your boy...you should get used to sharing more! And getting more intimate. If he lets his fantasies run wild with you, then he feels at ease around you. You should reciprocate and not be shy abuot it at all, since he's obviously not!

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A female reader, person12345 United States +, writes (2 July 2012):

person12345 agony auntIt might help if you said it on the phone rather than over text. People use text-based things to say things they wouldn't normally say with their own voice. It means no face to face. So if you were able to say it out loud, I think it would be helpful. Also with text, you don't really know his reaction. But over the phone, you can hear his voice and hear that he's really into it too. If you like dirty talking, you might also consider trying it in person to get more comfortable about it.

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (2 July 2012):

aunt honesty agony auntThis is quite normal, we let our guard down through text messages and we say more than we would face to face, we cannot read the other persons body language through messages as well so it always makes it worse seeing them the next time and feeling embarrassed. It can be hard to over come. But 5 months is not a long time to be together and you will get more comfortable in time with him.

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