A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My ex bf and I were broken up for a year and got back together 7 months ago and everything is great now. I found out right before we got back together he slept with another girl... it was while we were broken up but still sleeping together. This has really been bothering me and I've been bringing it up a lot because it makes me so angry that I wasn't enough for him at that time. Now I winder if I wasn't good enough to just be with Me then why did he a month later say he only wants to be with me and no one else. He says at that time he Just wasn't ready for everything I had to offer and wants spend rest of his life making it up to me. Why do I feel so hurt about this when we weren't even together officially and how do I stop making this a situation now that things really have been great. I am too hurt about the past. Can I trust him
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 December 2010): My boyfriend has just broken up with me and I would absolutely dread it if he was to go off sleeping with someone straight away! However, guys are different than us, your boyfriend probably slept with someone while you were broken up as a kind of release, not just sexual but to get his mind off you in a funny sort of way. I think most women would never feel like being with anyone else for a long time after a break up and certainly could never bring themselves to have sex. The fact that you got together again is great, but I don't blame you for feeling insecure. You knew that he slept with someone on your break before you got back together again and so the choice was yours to take him back or not. Personally, I couldn't get back with someone who slept with someone else soon after as he can't have had much love and respect for you, even though you were officially broken up. What changed for you both to come back together again? I have heard it said that in this situation sometimes a man has had an eye on a girl for a while (before breaking up) and wanted to pursue something with her. Without wanting to cheat, breaks things off with his girlfriend thus allowing him some guilt-free pleasure, then when it didn't work out he comes back to his ex! In this case, at least he didn't cheat. However, if the relationship hits some bad times (its not all a bed of roses) who's to say he won't be tempted again and either break things off or worse - if you are married to him - cheat?! Think about that!
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