A
female
age
30-35,
*pendy
writes:Why do I still love him after all these time? is there something wrong with me?I miss my ex boyfriend so much. I loved him so much, I never stopped loving him.We were so in love. We did everything together. He introduced me to his family and friends and they all loved me.But he broke up with me saying he didn't want a relationship anymore:( I cried so much I've never cried or felt that way about anyone the way I feel about him.Is been a year now since we broke up and I think about him everyday. I miss him, his smile, his voice, his smell, us, everything about him. I still love him. I've been keeping busy but he's still there in my mind and in my heart. I don't want anyone else. I just want him. I feel I can't have what I had with him with anyone else.What should I do? He wanted to be friends. But I said no cos it'll hurt to see him with someone else.He rang me 2weeks ago. When he rang me heart was beating so fast I cut him off short cos I know I love him but can't have him:(
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female
reader, MaryB  +, writes (25 March 2012):
First off, I'm so sorry that you are hurting & I also, know exactly what you are feeling. I too, am still hurting over the loss of my ex & it's been well over a yr. I know that I should just move on as you should but, I still have not come to that point yet & not sure when that will be. We were together for 7 yrs. so it may be a little harder for me to do, than you.
I do know one thing though, our minds play tricks on us...we tend to only remember what was good in our relationships & not the bad. If your relationship was as wonderful as you are thinking it was I would imagine you would both still be together. I'm glad that you chose to not remain friends because that is just a trap...it gives you false hope that maybe down the road you both can reunite. In their minds remaining friends is just a ploy to keep you hanging on in case things don't work out else where for them & also, so they can walk away guilt free for breaking your heart. It's actually very selfish on his part...why would you want to remain friends with someone you loved who walked away without another thought. His reason was also, in my opinion the cowards way out...I suspect he had his sights on someone else & that is why he ended it. Whether it worked out or not one will never know. He possibly did get with someone & now that it is over he is ringing you. You were wise not to continue talking to him...it would be so easy to fall back into things with him again if that were his intentions. He may be feeling lonely right now but, if he really was sorry for what he did to you & wanted to rekindle your relationship again he would continue to try to talk to you but, it's been two wks. since you cut him off & you haven't heard from him. Sounds like you might of been just a whim at the moment because nothing was happening for him. Why else, have you not heard from him in the past year?
I know that this is not what you probably want to hear & I'm not saying all this to hurt you further than you already are...I'm saying these things because I think you deserve to be loved & cherished by someone who really appreciates your worth. He is NOT that person! Somehow you need to move on & get him out of your system as I too, need to get over my ex. That ship has sailed & there is no going back. If you did get back with him you would probably drive yourself crazy worrying whether he was going to dump on you again. You are young & there is so much more waiting for you out there...believe me, if you give yourself the chance to meet new people, someday a new love will come into your life & you will look back & wonder why you wasted so much time loving someone who didn't care enough about you to make it work. Take care & good luck!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2012): Its obsession, its worse because he broke up with you when YOU thought it was going to last forever.
Thats life I am afraid and nearly every adult has been through it at some point and survived. You have to come to terms with it.
Try meeting other men. Just date them, nothing heavy,get used to being around them again
Time IS a great healer and I am sure your Ex wasn't perfect,or the relationship or it wouldn't have ended, thats just how you remember it all.
You WILL get over him and move on.And if he rings again,don't answer,your not ready for that yet.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (14 March 2012):
 Sometimes when your heart is so stubborn, you just need one final closure because you still hope that he loves you. He is young and his breaking up reason sounds BS. What was it last time, split personality? What is that anyway? What was his intention of calling. Find out if he wants this etheric cord cut, or why does he still wants to keep in touch after you told him you don't want to be friends? If you know he has a girlfriend then I don't think you need that closure.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (14 March 2012):
 It sounds to me like he was your first true love and yes it is a very hard thing to get over. But I bet if you look back to how you felt a year ago and how you feel now there is a difference, really it just takes time and a positive attitude. No relationship is perfect so think of the things you didn't like about it and write them down, whenever you are feeling like you miss him read over them. I am sorry that you had to be hurt but I assure you that there are other guys out there who you could be just as happy with, you just need to have a positive attitude and allow yourself to get out there and meet new people.
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