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anonymous
writes: I am a female, 40's. Met a very nice man online, and he and I became 'just' good friends. We spoke on msn messenger, phoned, used webcams, so we knew each other quite well. In the beginning, he did like me more in a romantic manner but I kept it in perspective because of the distance. He understood this and was always respectable and a gentlemen. I knew he talked to many people online as he made friends easily, both men and women. Just an all -round genuine, nice person. After 3 years of us talking and just being friends, he met a lovely lady in his area. I was very happy for him and I told him that. He said that he told her of our friendship and she had no problems with that. Because his new relationship took up a lot of his time..I didn't talk to him online, as often. Then one day, out of the blue he calls me. Talked to him, shared some good stories, had a few laughs and then he ended the call by saying "Take care..we'll see you online" and he was gone. A few days later, I noticed he took me off his messenger! (deleted me right off his computer) I was feeling so saddened by that as I thought we'd had this genuine, good, good friendship. I admit, I miss him but just wanted some insights as to why he would totally 'cut me out' of his life. I was always kind hearted and very warm to him. Never rude, crude or anything! I have a new fella in my life, so I would never would've been a threat to his new relationship. I was so happy for him. So why would he just drop me and our great friendship, out of his life, just like that? I guess I'm just looking for support from you folks out there...I take my friendships to heart and this "kick in the pants' hurt like hell. Sigh!
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI am in shock. He died..I found his obituary online, about 3 weeks ago. His poor gf must be devastated as he passed away suddenly, at her home about 4 weeks ago. Heart attack. I have such nice memories and he was a good friend and I was honored to have known him. It's just so sad that he died so soon after finding such joy/happiness wuth this new ladylove.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks Happytochat. I was thinking pretty much the same thing as you said in your posting. I did write him a nice e-mail telling him "Hey, I noticed you took me off your messenger contact list. I have to assume this is an indicator you just want to move on to a new life and new beginnings with ____. Have a good life and much happiness for your future" And I left it at that. I do not expect a reply but I have to say..he was a good buddy and I think I can safely say, I did grow to love him but in a way that one respects and honors a dear old friend. He really was a ray of sunshine. I could totally be myself with him. It's too bad he felt he had to choose, though. That's life.
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female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (14 July 2006):
My guess is that his girlfriend was maybe geting jealous even though she wasn't in the start? Or maybe he did have feelings for you but knew nothing could come of it (due to distance) and felt it was wrong to stay in contact with someone he has feelings for while dating someone else?
I duno, they are just all I can think of. But what I can be pretty sure about is its probably nothing to do with you as a person. Its not like your a bad friend or anything. So don't beat yourself up about it.
Maybe you should consider just rining him and asking him whats up so you can get a straight answer?
Hope you work it out soon and good luck!
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