A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I have been together for a couple of weeks and everything was fine until a few days ago, we couldnt get enough of each other. Then all of a sudden, he hits me with a load of crap saying that we went too fast and because we're both busy (him especially with work and school) makes it hard to be together, he doesnt want a girlfriend who he will only see once a week. I asked him several times when we first got together if he felt that it was too fast and he said no, later telling me that he was too blind to see it at the time. I know he's a busy guy but it was HIM always calling me and making plans, we saw each other almost every day. We decided to take a couple of days off from each other and see how our schedules will be but in my experience when a guy wants space, he usually dumps me the next week :( He told me that it wasnt me that he's concerned about, its the relationship so I shouldnt take it personally but its hard not to. Right after we had that conversation, he messaged me and said he went to visit his family (whom i still havent met) and they asked about me, so he wanted me to know that I was on his mind. He told me that we can get through it but at the same time, he didnt seem sure. Is there any hope or are going to break up?
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female
reader, cnith +, writes (19 April 2010):
 It's possible you can take his word for what it is. Information. He just might be thinking things over and trying to figure out how to see you and still do school and work. That's got nothing to do with you but rather how full his plate is. Guys tend to give out information, not feelings so when he says don't take it personally, he means just that, don't take it personally. Guys aren't like women. Often they (because I don't really do this) say X but mean Y. You know like, "Oh no honey, I'm fine!" Could mean you better dig it out or me or I'll kill you. It rarely means, I'm fine. (I hate that, btw.)
You could guard yourself and prepare for the worst, if you want to but I'd still give it a chance and slow down. The fact that he messaged you to tell you he's thinking about you is a big thing especially since he was with family. If he was trying to be nice and dump you, he wouldn't have done that...unless he's a sick bastard just playing with you. But somehow, I SERIOUSLY doubt that.
A
female
reader, Jo Rocks  +, writes (19 April 2010):
 I think the we went too fast conversation happens when a guy gets what he wants from the girl and then realizes that the chase is over and now he is bored. I don't buy that he is confused about his feelings. Most likely he wants you to be around but he also wants to be able to fool around with other girls also hence the "I don't want a girlfriend that I can only see twice a week" statement.
Give him all the space in the world just like he wants, miss a few phone calls, don't call him back right away. It's ok because you know, he needs his space and he needs to learn that you have a life too.
If really has interest in you, it will not fade with time apart. It should make him miss you more and if it doesn't then you already know how he feels.
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