A
female
age
30-35,
*anzee
writes:I need help,I'm 15 in year 11 and there's this lad I like at schoolI havent been talking to him long, and we got together a couple of days ago, he dumped me last night, but I have never felt like this before. I havent stopped crying, I can't eat or sleep, all I can do is cry. Everything was perfect last night we kissed for the first time, we walked home together and I thought everything was great. But then he text me at 11 last night saying he couldn't do it for some reason or another, and today I have spoken to him about getting back together and everything, he said he would think about it, he's just text me saying,,,1)k bab iv thought about it and i dont think we shud c each other anymore ive fort bout it for long so i cant an im not changin my mind2)theres a lot of reasons and im not gna likeu but we dnt rele speak anyway3)i thought i liked u an u was presurin me keep askin me for an ansa on the spot4)yeh but i never did and i said something b4 things gt serious ive been honest so thats it now to mebut im in bits, and I love him so much, I know we were only together a while but I fell for him hard, and now I cant do anything with my life.I really need help ='([MOD NOTE: I have edited the main question for spelling and grammar, but I have left the points as submitted to preserve the nature of the content]
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2009): Girl, you need help. I've never seen someone who's only dated a guy for two days that's as obsessed as you. Come on! For goodness sakes, let's get real here! Love takes years and years. You are a true teenager. By the time you read this, you'll be onto your next guy!
A
male
reader, Illithid  +, writes (11 September 2009):
 First heavy crush. I felt much the same when the first girl I gave a Valentine's gift to wouldn't accept it. All I can say is that it gets easier, you'll come to realize that he wasn't as perfect as you believe him to be now, and that there are TONS of guys out there that are kinder, more giving, more honest, and even better looking!I'm not going to lie and say it's always easy, but it does get better. Just hang in there, get together with a few friends, and try to get through the week. Next week everything will feel better.
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A
female
reader, shna  +, writes (11 September 2009):
 boys come and go bu your friends will be there to support you no matter what theres going to be plenty of these boys theres basically queing up around the cornr to break your heart !=[ 3days isnt love .. it takes time to fall in love to get to no the person to be able to trust you with your life i dont think you loved this boy nobody can explain love properly but one day you will understand what love is and you will look back on this and u will laugh and think how stupid was i ps: choclate can mend your broken heart . always keep it close and dont txt him dont let him know that your bothered keep your head up high with a smile on your face it kind of annoys them if they think your not bothered
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A
female
reader, peekaboo_422 +, writes (11 September 2009):
 eat some ice cream,shed some tears and get going on the road of love. real love wont last two days.it will last a lifetime.i havent found my love yet but i will and without a doubt you will to.they come and they go but when u found they right person, you will know because no matter what you do to them they will ALWAYS come back to love you.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (11 September 2009):
 It's not love, honey. Not after only a few days. It is infatuation and maybe a little bit about hurt pride.
Be glad he dumped you now and not after 6-8 months. He was NOT the one for you. Not the one-right now for you either.
Wipe your eye - hold you head up high and let him go. Begging him to reconsider is not going to work, you just CAN NOT make someone like you or love you.
And I agree dumping someone by text just shows how pathetic this guy really is. ( and so is his spelling - atrocious!)
Chin up girl! Plenty of fish in the sea. Why settle for herring when you can have a swordfish ?
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (11 September 2009):
 Yes, you need help...you are fretting over someone who isn't really worthy and he is just an average teenage boy with an average teenage boy attention span. This was a couple of days and you don't love him - it is a mix of the attention of having a boyfriend, feeling special and lustful hormones. Sorry to be harsh but I was your age once (ok it was a while ago but I vaguely recall how that feels). Life is full of disappointments and the 'love of your life' is just that - he didn't dump you at the aisle, just after a date. This whole sorry mess of text-dumping suggests a lad who hasn't got the personality and courage to face you in person. His text messages are so badly constructed that it may take you two more days of your life to decode them...another words, he isn't einstein and he isn't worth wasting your time and energy on. Just because he doesn't like you enough to carry on dating it doesn't mean there are no other boys out there for you. If you are old and mature enough for dating anyone, you are old and mature enough to appreciate that you have to have self confidence and lots of self esteem to survive without a broken heart. We all get dumped sooner or later, and how you feel about you is the main factor in how you respond to being dumped. If you think 'my world has fallen in' then it suggests you don't feel so good about yourself, you expect other people to make you feel good (instead of feeling good about yourself) and you are not robust enough to handle rejection - another words, give up dating until you feel better. If you think 'his loss, plenty more fish in that sea' then you are perhaps better suited for dating and you feel good enough about yourself not to remain with boys who are not suited to you just to have a boyfriend to prop yourself up. Buy a HUGE bar of chocolate, rent a funny DVD and forget about the frog you kissed...there are plenty of prince charming types out there who don't dump by text message (that is sad).
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A
female
reader, Lola1  +, writes (11 September 2009):
 Two days...? You are not in love.
Stop harassing the boy with texts and move on before you earn a reputation for being pathetic.
Break ups are hard, but I have always valued my reputation. As such, I take comfort in protecting it to the best of my ability. I behave with self-restraint.
To move on, behave as though you have moved on. Get back to the things you enjoyed before you were involved with this boy and your heart and mind will follow.
And learn from this. Do not pressure people into making commitments.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2009): No matter how much you may love him you've got to accept you could do waaaay better than him. He may seem like all you want but would a proper boyfriend kiss you then dump you on the same night after two days of going out?
It may be difficult but try and move on, just don't think about him, everytime he comes in to your head blank him out. But before you do that think of all the bad things about him.
You deserve better than him! :)
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