A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid,Recently i've become really close to this girl who i've only met a few times but we talk everynight on the internet and text each other now and again. Its really hard i can't stop thinking about her and i just need some advice from someone i dont know, someone who can give an honest opinion to my problem. I met this girl about 2 months ago round my mates house. Now they slept together. My mate doesn't want anything to do with her and she likes him. He's kinda mucked her about and stuff. Ever since we started talking and getting to know her, its been really cool, and i met up with her last night with her friends in town. I wanted to see her to see if these fellings i have for her were for real and they are. I just cant stop thinking about her. When you hear about how they've been treated and you know how they've been treated, you feel compelled or at least i feel compelled to try my best to make her happy. I'm just asking for that oppourtunity to make her happy and i just want to know if i would get that chance, cos from others i know i've heard that she probably wouldn't get with a mate of someone shes been with... i dont want to ask her cos i dont want to know the answer if its what i'm thinking. What do you think i should do as i feel like i'm in Limbo???
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2007): Just make sure your feelings for her are genuine and that you really do want to date her, simply for who she is. Not because you have this need to make her happy, because one of your mates treated her badly. And also, make absolutely sure you don't mistake your sympathy for what happened to her, for really liking her, dear. She is not a rescue job. One more thing to consider, she may have a lot of emotional excess baggage to deal with in light of what your mate did to her. I would recommend that for now, you continue just being a supportive, good friend to her, until she is clear of any hurt that she could be dealing with. As you and she build a solid, more closer relationship, you will get a feel for what she is experiencing. Just take this slow, be patient and allow her time to heal and recover. Sometimes, being a rebound guy when you know she likes your friend...may cause you a lot of suffering down the road. You seem like a great guy with a big heart...just proceed with caution. I wish you the best and I hope she does see what a nice fellow you are. Good luck and take care, dear.
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