A
female
age
41-50,
*atstale21
writes:My ex boyfriend and I have been broken up for almost a year. I am still close with his family. He and I only talk when I am at his moms house and he I ls there. When we hang out, we have a great time. We have a lot in common, we laugh all the time and he will flirt with me. I found out through his mom that he likes another girl but when I come over its like the other girl doesn't exist. I still have feelings for him, but he doesn't know that. Does he still have feelings for me? What do I do? I feel as though he is confused.
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (2 May 2010):
I don't think he does, especially if his mother has said he has an interest in another girl. That pretty much says that she's warning you off, most likely because she knows you still like him and doesn't want you getting strung along. The fact is that if he wanted you back, he would have said something.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2010): I am a lot older than you but, went through a lot of the same feelings you did. I'm still friends with the man I broke up with. We really clicked right away and had a lot of fun, even though I saw red flags. I wanted to break up but, he begged me to give us another chance just to let him be the one to break up. He also tried some really imature things like trying to make me jealous with other women and set up events where I was the only one who ended up coming. I do see him a lot since we travel in the same circles and we do have fun hanging out once in a while. I did ask him to think about getting back together around four months after we broke up, just to have him tell me no, while he kept hugging me. I had two other major losses in my life during all this time the death of my father and loss of a job. I was just trying to hold on to one loss that I could. With time I realized that I was the one chasing him and even if we got back together, I would always be low on his list because he is career obsessed. I realized what I missed was having a relationship and wanted a good one. I met a man a few months back, who was really nice. We dated twice and then I was sick for a few weeks. We started dating again 5-6 weeks ago. He is the one chasing me and puts me high on his list. I have a question for you. Do you think he hangs around with you because he really likes you or just until someone better comes around. If his mom says that he likes someone else and it's not you, I would take it that he isn't into you. If he were, he would not be interested in someone else. In my situation, the man wanted to string me along for his own selfish reasons which are to feed his ego. The new man I involved with is interested in me and not playing games. It sounds like your ex is playing games. Either he wants you as a girlfriend or as a buddy. I know it may be hard but, just go ask him. This way you can move on either with or without him.
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