A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:hi,so, my boyfriend of a year has a wicked past of struggling between two women. His first gf was obsessive, controlling and mentally ill in some ways. His second was a normal girl, but he didn't ever love her. now, he's with me and i know he loves me, but he fights to keep contact with them. the crazy one calls every day almost or emails, texts, writes him and he says that she's getting better and wants to see how she is because he's worried about her. the second is manipulative and would withhold sex until he did whatever she wanted. he still was being manipulated when we met. i didn't realize that he was still thinking of her so often even in our relationship. it stopped a few months ago, but it still bothers me. we rarely have sex, and when we do, it's not that great. I don't think he's attracted to me, maybe it's cause i have small boobs and his exes had large boobs. but he won't do anything but plain vanilla sex with me. i am really kinky and want sex at least once a day. whats worse, his friends hit on me and call me hot, beautiful and sexy, but he never says anything like that. his friends joke that i'm the best (looking) he's been with, but he never says anything. i never had problems with insecurities before, but then again, i've never been in this position. i've always been the hot gf, not the girl that would make a good wife. i want both! isn't that possible?!! now, i asked him if he needed to continue to talk to these girls because he was lacking something with me, and he said, 'nobody is perfect' ... wtf i want to just leave him now, i'm so upset!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Red Green 0289 +, writes (3 September 2011):
You're wasting your time on this guy... you're not going to be able to fix him and he's broken. Cut your loses...
A
female
reader, mizz.butterflies +, writes (3 September 2011):
 just leave him. hes insecure and immature.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2011): forget him,he doesn't deserve you..he's just hurting you..give him time to think over what's wrong with him..i think he has a problem..
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (3 September 2011):
 This guy really sounds like trouble. Anyone who spends so much time badmouthing their exes is generally the one with the problems, not the people being badmouthed. They all were controlling and manipulative and such, what do they all have in common? Him. Meaning they probably weren't but it was his perception of them. Also talking to his ex every day because he's worried about her mental health? That's a pretty big stretch in terms of acceptable behavior in a relationship. He clearly doesn't respect your feelings at all, a lot of the things he says are obviously intended to hurt you and make you insecure.
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