A
male
age
51-59,
*igdriver
writes:Hi there,I have a question and concern. I have been married for 18yrs and to this day have not messed around on my wife. She is turning 50 this week and I am 43yrs old. We have 2 kids and own our home.My wife has no intrest in sex what so ever, it has now been over a year. I have asked her if there has been an issue that she might want to talk about and she says no and will not look at me or talk about it.She seems to be at home 90% of time and i can't see where she would be able to have an affair.Now she did go to Vegas the same year this changed, but to this date she denies anything like that.Prior to her Vegas trip we has sex about 3-4 times per month and more if we were alone.What can I do, or how can I get her to just be open and honest?.If I even ask why she gets all moody and just will not talk about it.thanks for all your timebigdriver
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (26 October 2010):
 Well, it does seem that something fishy happened in Vegas. Could it be that she contracted an STD or feels guilt over an affair? Her distance suggests that she's hiding something...
Maybe marital counseling would help whatever the problem is to come out, because this sudden change is unusual and something must have motivated it. Good luck!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2010): Get a marital counselor and be prepared to put in a lot of work and time to get to the bottom of it and talk about things that are very personal.
It will probably take months to get the full story.
You can't get her to do anything, you can only encourage.
She may be home 90% of the time, but frankly if you go from sex weekly, to no sex, and she won't look at you are talk about it, then there is more likely than not someone else, or has been someone else, and now her guilt makes her unable to manage the relationship at home.
Sorry, but that is the largest reality here.
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