A
male
age
41-50,
*ingohere
writes:Why is it that every one thinks that guys only want sex and if you say anything your going to make the woman mad,what about how i feel?i would like to see women thinking about us guys the way we realy think about them.im a guy who loves the one im with,but cant realy tell if she loves me.i think women should be thinking more on the lines of what am i oing to do if i lost him. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (13 December 2009):
 Please do not take my comment about spelling and writing personally, "mingohere," but I can understand that you would. Certainly half of the postings and responses on this Web site and elsewhere are just as misspelled or grammatically incorrect. Many are much worse. It's just I have been a professional writer most of my adult life and it sometimes drives me nuts trying to read and comprehend postings that are poorly spelled, lack proper punctuation and all that. My apology for taking off on your posting specifically.
A
male
reader, mingohere +, writes (13 December 2009):
mingohere is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI do tell her how i feel and show her.to the ones who say something about the way i write,if you had to drop out of school at 16 and help your family by working 12 hours or more a day and then get married at 17 with kids.i think you to would have some pros with the way you spell or wright.ive learn the hard way about life,but that does not show what kind of guy i am.im not married any more after 13 years.i do have 3 great boy,im 34 and own a biz and work part time from 330am to 830 am.at a spa.so i think im doing good 4 myself.to the ones who over looked the way i wright and spell and answered from the heart i thank you
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2009): I see that women have been in the relationship business since early age.They are so good at it that they can practically read our minds and expect us to do the same.I have observed the ladies men,players and they don't waste their time defending manhood.They spend their time having fun enjoying life, women and what ever else amuses them.Women want to be valued for who they are not how well they meet your needs.They don't want to be responsible for your feelings.This may go over your head but I hope it makes sense.
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (10 December 2009):
 Standing up for guys
I have often said that men think differently than women do, not better, not worse, just differently. I believe that many of the stereotypes we are talking about here stem from those differences.
I think that men and women should be comfortable with their own gender. They should respect others for their strengths, try to understand their differences, and not expect everyone to be just like them. I believe that all people should be honest, and carry their own weight. I believe that weaker persons should be protected by stronger persons.
Unfortunately the world isn't that way. I will however stand up for any stand up guy. I will respect any respectable woman. What can we do more?
FA
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2009): We could get 80% of men acting like the poster suggests and it still wouldn't help.
Most of the women would still go for the other 20% of us anyway. And they would gripe about what jerks men are when those men don't treat them well.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (10 December 2009):
 Maybe a lot of women don't want to be dependant on a man? If a partner cheats out the door they go for most people. I see nothing wrong in that.
What I do see WRONG - is people not having any values, morals or respect for others.
And you do know that woman aren't mind readers either? right? ;)
You want YOUR woman to know how you feel or think, TELL HER.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (10 December 2009):
My immediate response is: Where did you, and many other posters, go to school and supposedly learn to write, spell and punctuate? That school needs to be shut down! But I think that I understand your basic premise.
My thought: While possibly about half of the young men out there just want sex from girls without commitment or much obligation, at least another half (I hope) would also want to have an ongoing relationship. Who knows what the true percentages may be? But as an older man who has had both frivolous and long lasting relationships during my 62 years so far, I must say that it is much more rewarding to have long-term and meaningful relationships. And I hope that most men would agree. It's up to the women to try to determine in which category their potential mate fits, assuming they want more than another tryst.
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A
female
reader, Farm Girl +, writes (10 December 2009):
 A reply to your post and a reminder to women.A relationship is a two way thing. I've seen many women take advantage of their man. He sends flowers on her birthday and anniversary, takes her to dinner, fixes her car, buys all sorts of gifts, helps with laundry and dishes. Listens to her problems and somehow finds a way to get through that sometimes miserable week every month. What does he get in return? Often times, not much!I've heard the excuses of: "I cook for him and clean the house, besides, all he wants is sex." Oh ghee, Do you like living in a messy house? Don't you like sex? Do you call ordering out or taking something out of a box and mixing it with hamburger, cooking? Seems that HE'S the one I see out tending to the grill! By the way, Nice boots! I hear he saw them and thought of you! What'd you do for him in return?Then if he strays off, they're devastated! He's the no good SOB.Granted, there are alot of guys who come home and park themselves in front of the TV and do nothing to contribute to the workings of a home. Those are the schleps that should be thrown out!Having another woman sniffing around at your man can be a real eye opener! His feelings and emotions are just as important as hers. Keep it constant, always leave your scent!Something my Dad said to me: " Want him to be more of a man? Try being more of a woman!"
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2009): First, you need to type in complete sentences.
Second, if you are in a relationship the 'us' should not be about men but about the two of you. Why generalise? "Men don't call, they only want sex, women are complicated, they only want marriage" these are all stereotypes that we fall back on when we cannot make sense of our partner.
Sit down with your woman and articulate what you feel. What you like about her. Where you see the relationship going. Ask her to tell you what she feels about all that. And then see what comes out of it.
This sounds like a threat to her rather than a question to us.
If she really does not make you feel loved or wanted disappear for a few days. That is what we tell the women - not to be needy. It works sometimes. May work for you too.
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