A
female
age
26-29,
*orrely
writes:my boyfriend and i have been going out for 11 months. we used to talk for hours about everything, laughing and smiling, but now we just have nothing to say. we don't make each other laugh or smile as much, and we've talked about it, but we don't want to break up because we can't bear to think of losing each other. sometimes all our convos are observational stuff, like, have you notcied the new sign outside the door? funny! and we never talk about other things like we used to. i really miss that. is there any way we can get back to that? if so, how? if not, has the relationship pretty much run its course? i can't even bear to think of being without him, still, and i cannot bear to think of him being with anyone else, because i really care about him. i just don't know what to do :( Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (7 November 2010):
 Why must you always be talking? My mouth would get tired. Rent movies, watch them together, cuddling on the couch..that doesn't require conversation. Go to a show, then go grab a bite to eat afterwards...share your opinions of the comedy you just saw. In addition to Jmc930, I love to go to the park especially when it's nice out, and people watch..That gives you a lot to talk about.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2010): You know a lot about each other, which is why you aren't talking the same way you used to. There's a period where there's always something to talk about, but then you can run out of talking about yourself and your interests after being involved so long.
Do fun things together and spend "quality time" – don't just sit around and watch TV on the couch. If you can have fun and laugh together, you'll feel closer together, and you'll have more things to talk about if you're doing these activities together.
Try seeing an interesting movie and then having coffee or smoothies after to talk about it, playing miniature golf or doing something else competitive, going ice-skating, etc. Get out of the house and out doing something. Even if you're just playing on the playground at the park (FREE!), it'll be more interesting than staring at the same four walls.
Best of luck!
...............................
A
male
reader, Latino201 +, writes (7 November 2010):
Wow, you are so young! If you think about it, most conversation come from sharing experiences, as a couple and as an individual. I'm not sure what you guys do day to day.. but does not sound like you are having much fun. I suggest you go out and experiment, try different things... snowboarding, horseback riding, go dancing someplace new, make new friends or take up a hobby together like cooking or art. Trust me, with new things come new conversation and good times. Give it a try!
...............................
A
female
reader, Franny Girl  +, writes (7 November 2010):
 Hey,
Hmmm, a rather sticky situation, 11 months and you really honestly feel the conversations are running dry?? in my honest opinion, this might not be working? i sure ther emust be tones of other things to talk about, things you used to do when you were little? fond memories, memories of you 2? go out for dinner? go to music festivals together, im pretty sure that will spark up the convo?
If u really feel that, this might not be love? i mean love is diffrent for diffrent people... i think you should talk to each other about why you think this is occuring? maybe you could take a break? i no you said you could not bare for him to be with another girl, then have an agreement of some sort?
i hope i helped?
sorry if i was tad harsh?
best of luck
xxxx
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2010): Well I'm going to take a wild guess and say you guys spend every second of every day talking or with eachother. This is why you're out of topics, you never do anything on your own or with others. A relationship is just as much about doing things without your partner as it is doing things with him. But that could only be one possibility(and from experience the most common among teenagers)
So go hang out with your girlfriends, enjoy time away from the bf. It doesn't mean you two are broken up or 'taking a break' it just means you two both have lives outside eachother, which I can't stress enough, is very important in a relationship.
Cheers!
Molly
...............................
|
