A
female
age
30-35,
*ant it to work
writes:hey woundering if you can help,I have been with my parten Ed for almost 5 years, and have 1 child aged 3 and half. Things were great until I was pregnant where it appeared if he could have a night or a boozed up long weekends he would causing many aruguments from both sides. Due to my age i was living at home with my mother and he wasn't allowed to stay. When baby was born things appeared to get better, he had a good job that involed working away and only home weekends even though we didnt spend a great amount of time together, the times where we were together were great. Just after baby's first birthdayI had a house and we moved in together innationaly he didnt help with the money side of things, which i found very hard, again causing many arugments.Arugments usaully meaning i would get very hot headed and end up kicking him out. I doubted his infudelity because his phone was hiden and then i got i chance to see it there was girl numbers on there and also texts coming through for girls he had spoken to online. He started going around with people who i disappoved of then to my nightmare discovered and little plastic drug bag, this has never been resolved as the over rides situations (i believe to be cocaine). This left me very confused about myself and also very lonelythats when i took to the internet to find company.Then we found out I deleted contacts and made a new email address. Where i had been 1 guy inperticial nothing in comman i decided to met after my partner had been out the night before came home at 6 in the mornin and had hiden the phone under our mattress, where he'd had many girls numbers on. That guy knew about me being in a relationship and then we met nothing happened he just spoke. Sereval days after meeting this guy i felt so guility and told that guy i wanted to put 110% effort back into my relationship and didnt appove, I told him everything and we then resolved it. Of course we have a ups and downs but things were better during summer months seem to get better we went out camping and done things like normally families. After another arugment ending up with him leaving the house and on another boozed week he came bk apologised said everything was going ok, we work hard together to get it all sorted. When we returned home i fell asleep on sofa, i reached into his pocket to look at his phone to find numbers under names of "rub junc. 37" and 5/6 more under simular names when i phoned i was absulty devastated to find them being escort agentcies. I took baby over to my mums as i knew thing arugment was going to get heated, was right it was a massive arugment although he said they were just numbers and didnt do any thing. Things returned back again to how they were then 2 days later i found an address where he was going to met 1. Shock horror , athough he says he didnt do anything. Weeks pass before another arugment orrured once again he took to drink, he met up with an old friend and they started text each other. We were back and for on monthly bases. One day then out of the blue he texts me, although ment for this old friend . I phoned him and he told me he didnt want me him and her were going to try to take this further. Distaught and hurt didnt know what to do with myself, i tagged along with my mum and family friends to local family pub where a guy came aong and toke interest in me, in the state i was in i decided to try and block him with this other guy who was single dad. WE had a good personality, flash car and nice house, but it was everything i dont want i just wanted him back. After him seeing our child he texted and said , he loved me and missed me. I was over the moon, he moved back in and everythign was great that was until this old friend starting texting again causing arugments. When i asked what has came of them both, he told me nothing had happended he just wanted me off his back. Many weeks later explainned there had 1 kiss, i was hurt although had no chioce other than to accept. Months later we yet again became to drift. He left i found myself again using chatrooms 6 weeks past many without sight nor sound his time didn't even see our child for 4 weeks (longest ever). I become friends with a black guy, met and on second meeting had intercourse. I am a strong believer that sex is a special gift given 2 people in love although this was meaningless and left me really confused. I wanted no more than to a a friendship, I texted him although he didn't reply. Ed came to the house out of the blue, we chatted and he said he wanted to get back, not knowing about this other guy, when i told him he was phyisically sick. We spoke and i told him i was very confused and that i love him buh no longer wanted to get hurt, then his other guy starts texting there was no doubt on how i felt with him he was friend and what had happened had been souly a mistake. I get back with Ed beliving that all was going to be fine 2 weeks later whilist on his account i discover a message from a girl, i asked him and he had the courage to tell me after an arugment with family and friends we went to stay in a bnb he recieved a text from someone which he'd met and they ened up spending the night together(involing intercourse).When he woke he relised it was a mistake and that we should try again. Ed didnt like to say inally because i had so confused weeks and now months have past again like all relationship we still have our ups and downs but i find this problem is effecting me mentally i am tried and no longer want to aruge,I adore him. Just now its begin to take my sex drive, the thoiught of it all puts me off. I have told him i have forgotten it all and have moved on although m not being to honest with him. I fear arugments of explainning it all to him. Suddenly out of the blue this old friend texts" fancy a shag? " he still insist nothings happened after an arugment i go to stay with my mum for the night now today the phone bill has came with sexline numbers on. He says they were to hurt me like i have hurt him. Thanks would be very greatful, i love him dearly and want this to work.
View related questions:
chat room, escort, living at home, money, moved in, sex drive, text, the internet Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, kellyxxx +, writes (6 March 2009):
 He sounds like a low life and you need to do better, not just for you but you need to think of your baby! You don't wanna raise a child with all this going on! Its really selfish! You need to focus on yourself and your child, leave your boyfriend, a leopard never changes its spots! Your boyfriend will never stop messing around and hurting you! Don't stand up for this situation, if there's one thing you do for your child get out quick!!!!! If he confronts you about this then you need to tell him to grow up! You will be better off without him, good luck, keep me updated! X
|
